so reason I am posting this is a story. Since I was young I always enjoyed the thought of being a girl. As a kid I would pretend to change genders and put toys in my butt. I bought my first dildo the day I turned 18, and had sex with a guy at 19. I had my first girl at 20. I started dressing fully, past what I could steal from my mom as a kid, at 21 for a guy I met on Craigslist. I got married to my beautiful wife at 22. In the first year of our marriage she cheated. She came clean because of fear I would find out. I used this to tell her that I enjoyed dressing in women’s clothes and getting fucked in the ass by guys. She agreed to buying me clothes and let me have gay sex. Fast forward a few years she cheated again, I use cheated because it was without my knowledge. This time the guy recorded her sucking him off and sent it to me. I had an instant boner. This is where my cuckold life started. I wanted her to get fucked and tell me all about it. Fast forward a few more years she had found a bbc and fell for him. She told me she always secretly hated my gay side. In an attempt to save my marriage I threw away all my girl stuff and repressed all gay thoughts. After 5 months of trying to prove to her I wasn’t gay, she moved in with her bull for about 3 months. During all this I had zero sissy or gay thoughts. She ended up getting tired of him and moved back with me. Ok so here is my issue since she has been back all I want to do is be a sissy again. What the hell do I do?