Hi this is a long cuckold story and will take some time to build up. Every effort has been made to keep up the heat in every update as much as possible. Please give me your comments and merciless criticisms. Thanx Hi my name is Suresh and i am from India. This is the story of my descent from me thinking that I am a â€˜MANâ€ to understanding and accepting the fact that I am a sissy-cuckold and a cock-sucking faggot. Itâ€™s not that I became a cuckold, but itâ€™s about me realizing through Roopa (my GF, who later became my wife) that I am a natural born submissive sissy-cuckold. I was born to serve REAL men and THEIR women. My role is that of a mentally-castrated male who has happily accepted that the natural order of stronger men dominating weaker males is perfectly right. The weaker male removes himself from the mating rituals so that he does not pass on his inferior genes to the future generations and â€œpolluteâ€ it. He derives sexual satisfaction from watching the superior men fucking all women including his wife. This is the built in mechanism in evolution of species and so the weaker males constantly strives to ensure that his wife gets fucked by superior males so that he can be sexually satisfied. Thatâ€™s the only way the weaker male is able to get an erection. This is his duty. This arrangement works flawlessly in most other animals and humans have been artificially made to believe that all males deserve to have sex. This is a nasty trick played by our society which has imposed many taboos on women trying to have sex with as many men as possible. But Roopa has opened my eyes to this reality and has sexually enlightened me. Now I am a free person who no longer carries the burden of trying to be a male and fighting my natural urges of being a submissive inferior sissy-male. I am very thankful to Roopa for showing me the way. I dedicate this story to the woman who loves me deeply and helped me realize the purpose of my life. I would like to start, well from the beginning. This started when I was 21 and entered MBA. I am a less than average looking guy and I am a perfect example of what â€˜ordinary â€“ lookingâ€™ means. I am not ugly but I was close to ugly than handsome. I was skinny; brown skinned and with pimple scarred face. I was good in academics. I was not a confident guy and therefore I would act in anyway to please people and get their approval just to feel good and make myself part of a group. I think I was a â€˜goodâ€™ guy and took pride in the fact that I will be good to others even when others are mean to me. I would go to any length, sometimes even sacrificing my self-respect to please people. I never had the balls to say â€˜noâ€™. I would turn the other cheek if somebody slapped me. Later I realized that it was not so. I simply did not have the spine to stand up to people who insult me. I did not have the courage. I was simply a wimp who masked his weak-personality under the facade of being a â€˜good-guyâ€™. In short I was a doormat on which anybody can walk on!!! Girls staying away from me and avoiding me was my singular great talent. I never had a girlfriend. I had never spoken to a girl for more than 10 mins ever since I was a teenager. I had never touched a girl (even accidentally) or even sat next to one. The only pussy I had was the space between my two fingers and my palm. I used to masturbate vigorously thinking of all the girls in my class. That was my sex life. In those days one has to remove the footwear while going inside the computer room. So whenever I found lots of girlâ€™s slippers outside I used to deliberately bend over and drop my pen or book on them. In this pretext I touch their slippers and shoes. Sometimes if some girl had just removed her shoes (especially when she hadnâ€™t worn any socks), the inside of the shoes used to be moist and very warm. Dipping my fingers into the shoes gave me raging hard-on and I used to think of it as putting my cock into their pussies. I have fantasized about putting my cock into a sweaty shoe and fucking it. Sometimes I even rub the bottom of their slippers and get as much dirt as possible on my fingers. Then I rush to the menâ€™s toilet and rub the dirt from their slippers on my cock and on my balls and into my pubic hair. I treated the dirt as if the girls were some divine Goddess and the dirt from their slippers was some Prasad. The sheer shame and this degrading act of rubbing shoe dirt on my cock and balls gave me massive erections. I never understood why the â€œSHAMEâ€ was turning me on so much. I thought it was because of not masturbating frequently and hence the erections. In my hostel room I used to think of this â€œshoeâ€ scene and rub my cock vigorously. My other outlet for sexual satisfaction was the college ladies toilet. I deliberately used to pass by the ladies toilet and catch the look on the faces of girls going in and coming out of the toilet. The ladies toilet like all toilets has a unique stench. The stinking smell of the ladies urine combined with their shit gives a pungent smell which most men may find disgusting. However those smell from the ladies toilet aroused me sexually. The wet foot marks of the ladies slippers outside the toilet gave electric shocks to my cock. Here I must mention one faculty named Nagarani. She was in her forties and was still unmarried. She was a tall dusky, well built woman like a dominatrix. Her face was brown almost chocolate like. Her cheek bones were like chiseled like Pakistani women or Aryan women of North West India. Her lips were thick and pouting. Her shoulders were wide, strong and her massive boobs just popped out of her chest like a jelly and seemed as if it would fall down and crack the floor. Her pointy nipples used to remind me of the republic day parades where armored steel tanks move with their barrels pointing upwards. Her boobs did look like battle tanks and ready to shoot any unworthy, weak man who dared to stand before her. I used to think that her boobs were indeed â€œweapons of MASS destructionâ€ and should be declared as national assets. For some reason Nagarani used to wear pure white bra and contrasting dark colored blouse. She would leave her saree open on the sides and one could see the white lacy bra through her blouse. I always wondered if she wore matching white panties. Sometimes I loved to think that she might not be wearing any panties underneath and that her cotton petticoat directly touched her soft, plump, dark, fleshy ass-cheeks and some cloth even getting stuck between her ass cracks. Phewâ€¦I had always thought of sex when I saw a woman. What they might be wearing, do they shave their cunt and the ass crack, how much do they shit, how much shit must be inside their ass hole etc. Thinking these thoughts about my unmarried MILF professor made me go 10 times crazier. One evening about 9 pm in the night I left the library into the hallway. The whole building was vacant. Suddenly I saw Nagarani madam walk towards the ladies toilet which was at the end of the hallway. After she had entered the ladies toilet, I tiptoed towards the toilet and stood very close to it, in fact I was leaning on one of the walls where the â€œladies toilet symbolâ€ is displayed. I could hear her footsteps tap inside and then the creaking sound of a bath room cubicle door open. I had my hands on my crotch. My dick was standing hard like an erect army soldier. Then I heard muffled sounds of saree being pulled up, petticoat being rolled up and sound of her bangles moving against each other. Then there was a â€œsnappingâ€ sound made by the elastic of her panties being removed from her well built, dark, massive, majestic, dominatrix hips. Then for few seconds I didnâ€™t hear any sound and I inferred that she might be holding up her saree and petticoat with one hand and rolling her panty with the other. I was in an animal-like craze filled with lust. I was thinking about Nagarani madamâ€™s swollen pussy and whether it was hairy or shaven. Is she wearing a cotton panty or a lacy frilly bikini bottom?? Is her inner wear stained with bits of pee in the front and is it stained brown where it had gone inside the ass-crack? Only these thoughts were in my mind. I did not care that I was still inside the college building. My sexual satisfaction was the most important thing to me and I have never come this close to hearing a woman peeing in the toilet. I didnâ€™t care about anything in the world â€“ no morals, no taboo..nothingâ€¦I was just a sexually frustrated animal. All that mattered was my cock, its throbbing and its pleasure. I was thinking with cock and not with my head. The shame of standing outside ladies toilet and jerking to the smell and sound of urine made me mad. I wanted to feel that sinful and disgusting pleasure. I closed my eyes and placed my hands on my crotch, hurriedly unzipped and ran my hands over my cock-head. Then I heard a mild grunt of Nagarani madam sitting on the toilet seat. She must have bent her wide hips, placed her thick thighs on the toilet seat, her massive ass must have parted slightly along the ass crack and a part of her ass must have gone into the hollow of the toilet seat. Ahhhhhhhhâ€¦..heavenâ€¦.Nagarani madamâ€™s ass on the toiletâ€¦.lucky toilet seat. Wish I was born a toilet seat just to enjoy the warmth of her divine ass. The I heard a small soft bursting soundâ€¦.and a mild puff like air escaping from a balloonâ€¦.oh my GODâ€¦she had fartedâ€¦scented air from inside her divine body had come out of her tight asshole and I went wild into sexual pleasure and was in heaven. Then there was the squirting and dripping sound of her urine purring out between her legs and running into the toilet. That sound to me felt like the divine ringing of bells in a temple. Nagarani was my Goddes, the toilet my temple, the toilet seat was her â€œvahanâ€ and sqirting sounds of urine was the toling of bells. That was it for me and I lost control and squirted loads of cum into my hands and with great effort managed not to moan. Right at that moment when I was cumming ropes after ropes of semen, I heard some light footsteps and a girly giggleâ€¦I shrank in fear and opened my eyes and thereâ€¦before me was standing Roopaâ€¦the most beautiful girl in my class. My heart stopped. A chill ran down my spine, my knees grew weak and I was shaking. I didnâ€™t know what hit me. Shame and fear took me. My cheeks and face were blushing red and I could barely open my mouth to speak. There I was leaning on the ladies toilet masturbating to the sounds of my professor urinating inside and with cum in my hands and the most beautiful girl in my class standing before me and giggling at my SHAME and DEGRADATION. My cock which had become small after ejaculation for some strange shocking reason and to my utter horror was beginning to get erect as an iron rod. I stood frozen like a mouse before a snake which was about to eat it. Then I heard the sounds of flushing inside the toilet. Nagarani madam is done with her nature calls and may come out any moment. Roopa looked at the panic which was gripping. Still smirking she pointed to the room nearby and whispered into my ear â€œdonâ€™t you dare zip up your trouser or clean your cumâ€. I did not think twice and I like an obedient dog ran towards the room while still holding my cock. Roopa was still recording me on her mobile. I squat down on the floor to avoid being seen. Soon I heard voices of Nagarani madam speaking with Roopa. Later I heard madam walking down the corridor and after some time foot-steps on the stairs followed by sounds of a car starting and moving away. I was relievedâ€¦partly though. At least I escaped being caught by the professor. That would have been terrible. â€œCome out pervertâ€ Roopa shouted with authority mixed with amusement. I stood up to walkâ€¦but she interrupted me and said â€œjust crawl on fours like a bitch and come towards me and then go towards the ladies toilet door where you were wanking and kneel down there. I need to see your face with ladies toilet symbol behindâ€. I hung my head in shame. She was relentless. â€œCrawl bitch-boy with your head up, I need to see your pretty faceâ€. All the while she was recording me on the mobile camera. Filled with fear, shame and guilt I did as she commanded. My cum covered left hand left impressions of my hand on the floor and also some dirt from the floor stuck to my hands. Finally I knelled at the spot where she had asked me to. â€œStop!â€ barked Roopa. There was an evil glint in her eyes. â€œTake your ID card out bitchâ€ she said. Filled with dread I took it out and was confused not knowing what to do next. She asked me to show my ID card towards the camera which I did promptly. She ensured that the details of my card are clearly recorded. Then she noticed that my trousers were still unzipped. â€œTake out your pathetic cock out of your trousers and show it to the cameraâ€¦open your legs widerâ€¦I want to clearly capture itâ€ I did accordingly. In a stern voice she said â€œOK bitch-boy now answer all the questions which I am going to ask.â€ I said â€œyes madamâ€. Roopa seemed very pleased at this. She had never asked me to address her as â€˜madamâ€™, but my submissive side had surfaced unconsciously and which made me behave like a servant to her. She was enjoying this power and authority that she was having over me and was in no mood to let me go. â€œNow read out the details from your id cardâ€ she said. Dutifully I read my name, batch, roll no, my home address, my mobile number and even my blood group. Everything which I was saying was being video recorded. â€œOK Suresh, tell me are you a pervert?â€ she asked me in a very sweet voice. I hung my head with shame. I was still holding the card towards the camera. â€œAre you a pervert?â€ this time she was sterner. I was silent not knowing what to say. At this Roopaâ€™s tenor changed. She said, â€œWell bitch it seems you like it the hard way. Pull your trousers down and if you donâ€™t things will get more difficult for you.â€ To avoid harsher punishments I stood up promptly and pulled my trousers till my ankles. I looked liked a stupid standing like that before the ladies toilet. But I was hard as well and Roopa spotted the tents in my underwear. With an arrogant smirk she pointed her finger towards my bulge, looked into my eyes and slowly pointed the finger towards the ground. Nothing was said. I was a puppet in her hands. I was paying heavily for my perversions and for the sin of thinking with my dick rather than with my cock and now I have become an object of blackmail. Yet in small corner of my confused mind, I was enjoying whatever she was doing to me. I wished that this thing never gets over. She was the most beautiful girl in the college, a perfect beauty. Every part of her body was formed to the right proportions. Well blown and proud boobs, curving body, broad perfectly formed hips, fleshy, round, firm and round ass which was perfectly split at her divine ass crack. She was the dream of every guy in the class. I never had the guts to speak to her. I would steal glances at her and if ever she looked at me I used to feel inferior and bowed down my head with guilt and shame. I did not have the courage to look into her eyes. Now here she was talking to me, getting info about me, asking me to do things for her. She did care for me I thought as she hid me from Nagarani madam and saved my academic career. I felt lucky. I felt blessed that this angel is doing me a favor by talking to me. Suddenly I felt light and relieved. My fear and hatred about Roopa had given way to respect and a feeling of gratefulness. I must thank her for doing me this favor. So without any hesitation I rolled down my briefs as she had pointed with her fingers. My cock was rock hard and pointing up. I was feeling proud that Roopa could see a manly cock (which proved to be myth later). Controlling her laughter, she said â€œwow your cock is so big! And itâ€™s so hard. Am I turning you on? Or is it that me humiliating you is turning you on?â€ I thought she knew the answer, yet I lied to her trying to preserve some of my long lost dignity and said â€œyou are turning me onâ€. But she exactly knew what I was thinking. But she didnâ€™t press the issue further. Suddenly I realized that this is still being recorded! Roopa frown slightly and said â€œyour cock looks very disgusting with all that dirty hair growing around it like a disease.â€ It definitely was not a compliment but the hardness of my cock was telling a different story. Roopaâ€™s cruel and sharp mind was processing this very fast. Out of nowhere she took out a chewing gum and started munching on it arrogantly and examined my pubic area with contempt and looked into my eyes. Like a true submissive I could not maintain eye contact and bowed down. She then threw the chewing gum wrapper towards me and asked me to pick it up. Without thinking I knelled down, then bent forward, pressed my face and lips and against the floor and picked up the wrapper with my tongue. Images of pigs grunting and eating human waste near dust bins flashed across my mind. My mind was suddenly filled with anger and hatred towards myself. Roopa did not mean to pick up the wrapper with my mouth. She just wanted to use me as her servant and perhaps like a walking dustbin. Even she looked a bit shocked with what I had done and perhaps even disappointed with my lack of self-respect and self-denigration. But she did not show any emotion and was nonchalantly chewing and looking at me like a worm that must be crushed. I knelt up before her with the wrapper in my mouth. I was feeling very proud. I had not just let her boss over me but also showed her that how much I liked and craved for it. â€œDonâ€™t just stare at me bitch, chew the wrapper and swallow itâ€ she ordered. I was immediately on it. The waxy paper was hard to chew and had a bland taste. Roopa was looking at me curiously all while. The she asked to stop and open my mouth wide and brought the camera near my mouth. Her face had a disgusting look, similar to what one will have while flushing a commode after using it. She didnâ€™t wait for me to finish swallowing it and moved on. Never the one to forget things, Roopa came back to the question â€“ â€œare you a pervert Suresh?â€. Seeing that there is no escape I said â€œyesâ€â€¦ â€œyes what ?â€â€¦ â€œYes Madam Roopaâ€. â€œWhy do you think you are a pervert Suresh?â€ she asked me as if she was conducting a professional interview. â€œI stood out the ladies toilet, listening and masturbating to the sounds of Nagarani Madam Urinate and Shitâ€ I saidâ€¦my heart was racing; I was in an erotic rage. My hands were slowly moving towards my hard cock again. Roopa noticed it. â€œDonâ€™t try to touch your male member before a woman Suresh, itâ€™s not proper for a gentleman like you.â€ She said. Her sudden professional tone puzzled me. â€œWhy do you think listening to a woman shit is perverted Sureshâ€? She asked. â€œA woman shitting is very private and solemn affair and listening to it is considered as a taboo. Breaking any social norm is a perversion. Only desperate men do itâ€ I said. â€œWill you stand outside ladies toilet again and masturbate?â€ she asked me. I was suddenly gripped with fear. I cannot lie to this woman. Yet telling the truth before a camera was more than risky. With trembling hands and shaky voice, I squeaked â€œyes Madam Roopa if there is a chance I will masturbate near the ladies toilet. I have always been a pervert and I am so addicted to it that I cannot escape from this slavish desire towards women. I am beyond cure. I am addicted to masturbation, porn and perverted humiliation. I have become a slave to sexual perversions and I have lost the battle to overcome it. I am a sexual failure. I am a loser and I cannot lie to a majestic Goddess like you who has blessed me by talking to me. I donâ€™t deserve to stand in the presence of such a magnificent angel like you and I am very thankful that you have found me worthy enough to talk to.â€ Every cell of my body was burning. I spoke spontaneously and from the bottom of my heart. I did not feel any shame or fear. Suddenly Roopa looked at me as if something had clicked. Her expressions were different. It definitely was not disgust or anger. For a moment the majestic arrogance on her face had melted away and replaced with admiration and understanding. May be she liked my brutal honesty. She looked at me directly into my eye. Strangely for the first time I could look into her eyes. I felt a connection with her. But it was not like what happens between two people. It was more like the connection between the owner and her pet dog. It was a connection between two un-equals. Like between a superior human and her inferior sub-human creature. Nor was it a connection between a female and a male. It was the relation between the Queen of a kingdom and her castrated male slave.