The Hypocritical Cuckoldress/Hotwife

Discussion in 'Controversial Issues' started by mousehungcuck, Jan 1, 2017.

  1. mousehungcuck

    mousehungcuck Member

    How come some women think they deserve to have a lover on the side yet absolutely refuse to consider the same for their husband?

    There's a lot of high brow talk on this forum about her needs and if you really love her you'd let her experience everything life has to offer. Yet, many of the women are adamant that they would never stand for their husband sleeping with another woman. I wonder how someone could be so transparently hypocritical.

    Am I missing something?
  2. DSale

    DSale Guest

    My wife's friend is an ex boyfriend. They were together for 10 years, but he was just not able to commit

    They parted and I met her. She talked about him a lot when we first met. It may have pissed some guys off, but it didn't bother me. They had spent some of their sexually formative years together and it was obvious she loved him, but she wanted to settle down and have a family whilst he didn't. A wedding & a couple of kids later, she literally bumped into him in a shopping centre. She was excited and so happy to have met him after many years and her face lit up as she recounted what they talked about. She asked if she could have lunch with him another day. That night we fucked like we hadn't in years.

    So here we are many years after their surprise meeting up. They love each other and she loves me. I really do not see why its not possible for someone to love more than one person. I was happy for her to fuck him as long as she told me all about it afterwards. This greatly enhanced our sex life and closeness. That has now transformed into me cleaning her as she relates how she's just been fucked. She also has attempted to 'pull' a former School friend and wants to fuck a neighbour - but I dont know if that will ever happen

    Do I want to fuck others too? God yes!! If I was being totally honest, I have got together with a colleague a couple of times when away on business (yes, I know it was wrong, but I was young & stupid). Would I like to regularly fuck others and come home to tell my wife before another session with her? Of course. Would I like my wife to fuck numerous men - even strangers from bars etc? Yes I would! But she doesn't want it and in any case our relationship is definitely a one off ménage a trois, based on me and her bull both being in love with my wife, and not just sexual attraction. I think that's pretty straightforward and not highbrow in any way

    So I don't see any hypocrisy in our relationship, and frankly if anyone into this cuckolding/hotwife lifestyle seriously had these views, I'd say they should think again
  3. I do not consider my Wife/Cuckoldress or any other Wives/Cuckoldresses to be hypocritical in any respect. If they are not being fully satisfied in every respect by their husband/partner (or even if they simply wish to experience some variety) then they are fully entitled to seek satisfaction elsewhere from a real man with a real cock and should be encouraged to do so. This is entirely about Women's needs and entitlement to experience everything (and every man) that life has to offer.

    On the other hand if a cuckold is unable to satisfy his own Wife through his lack of expertise; lack of fitness; age; health; small penis; or single tiny testicle, then why should he seek to or be allowed to disappoint and fail to satisfy other Women.
  4. DeannaHouston

    DeannaHouston Well-Known Member

    I would love my husband to notice this post and chime in...

    I also see how I am a hypocritical person. I see how I want to fuck others and I do not want Jeff even being looked at. I feel this very strong ...he is mine...emotion.

    I do not understand why I am so unfair in my feelings and this posting is on topic for one of my biggest hang ups.

    I would rather give up cock than consent to an open relationship.

    Luckily for me Jeff has not had an issue with the disparity in our sexual freedoms. And I do struggle with the hypocrisy.

    Hopefully we get a lot of opinions, because this is of interest to me.
  5. JeffHouston

    JeffHouston Well-Known Member

    With all respect and only because you asked, yes. You are missing something.

    Having spent a significant part of my career in the sexual medicine industry, I can easily and confidently share with you that there is no such thing as "normal" or "average" sexuality. There is healthy sexuality and there is unhealthy sexuality. We know that each person's sexuality is unique. Marks of healthy include consent, compliance with laws, compliance with agreements, and constructive active communication.

    This forum is focused on and dedicated to cuckoldry. It is not trying to address or satisfy other variants of sexuality including those that involve open relationships, bi-lateral swinging, polyamory, etc. So, perhaps it makes sense that the postings have the orientation and content that you identified.

    Cuckoldry is a form of sexuality that couples can experience together. It may fit them perfectly. It may not fit them both. It may be one variant of their sexuality. It may be something that they try to see if they like it.

    Successful cuckoldry, which does not have to be permanent, needs a commitment to the woman's sexual pleasure. That means that the man commits himself to the activities and boundaries that the woman prefers and wants. It also means that both partners and all lovers are committed to and focused on the woman's pleasure, comfort, preferences, limits, whims, plans, changes, moods, cravings, curiosities, excitement and fulfillment. Think about that for a minute.

    The man's part is what we talk about a lot. And, the woman has the same requirements. She has to be strong, honest about and committed to her own sexual pleasure. Without her embracing her role, cuckoldry does not flourish and may not even exist.

    A woman stating her preferences for the sexual activities of her husband (no other women, sucking the bull, chastity, etc.) is part of the woman engaging in and embracing her important role in the cuckold relationship. She's not being hypocritical (a person who acts in contradiction to her stated beliefs), she's being fair.

    Cuckoldry is fundamentally a married or committed woman having sex with men who are not her husband. Lifestyle cuckoldry adds communication, consent and a dedication to the woman's sexual and overall pleasure. If the woman gets more pleasure from having her husband to herself, then she is acting responsibly to say so. If her husband feels the same way the he not being denied anything.
  6. DeannaHouston

    DeannaHouston Well-Known Member

    Dang, You are sexy! Thank you for responding, On this issue your opinion is so important to me.
  7. don_jetman

    don_jetman Well-Known Member Founding Member

    My wife was especially sensitive to the one-sidedness of our agreement when she first began to play. It was kind of sweet that she often let me know that she felt a bit guilty about getting to explore sex with other men, but not allow me to explore other women at the same time. But in the same breath she made it clear she wasn't comfortable even thinking about me with another woman. She knew it wasn't "fair", but she just isn't wired to accept infidelity on my part in our marriage. Emotionally, she just can't accept it. She was entirely open about her concerns, and I did my best to assure her she was enough for me. That's not hypocrisy in my book. It's an candid agreement between two people who love and trust each other very much.

    L was much less experienced than I when we met. She's 9 years my junior, and was raised in a more conservative environment. If there is any balancing of the equation to be done, it should favor her anyway. She's always had this "little-girl" sexuality, and it still shows itself now and then, but she now owns her sexuality rather than being guided and persuaded as in the past. Seeing her become the sexy woman she is today has been more than I had ever hoped for, and I benefit from that, just as she does from enjoying other men. She was always smart, but now she can play the coy ingenue, or the seriously hungry predator, at will. And switching from the first to the second is guaranteed to melt the heart and stiffen the package of any man, me included. She's so hot I don't want anyone else. In fact, sometimes I think I may have gained more than she has. That's not hypocrisy - it's an outrageously hot sex life together, often a mutual fuck-fest that I don't even have words to describe. How could I possibly get that with sex with any other woman? I'm a very, very lucky guy.

  8. mousehungcuck

    mousehungcuck Member

    I knew this post would be misunderstood by the high-brow types I alluded to.

    The question wasn't, "why does cuckolding work for YOU?" Nor was it a comment about what any particular couple enjoys. Nor did I ask for clarification on cuckolding ethos and propaganda. And yes, I am aware this is a cuckolding forum, hence, I posted this question in the 'controversial issues' section.

    The question was: Is it hypocritical to even have the desire to fuck other people while requiring your mate to be faithful? Stated that way it makes it rather rhetorical, doesn't it?
    Explore with me likes this.
  9. JeffHouston

    JeffHouston Well-Known Member

    I think that whether you find hypocracy is determined by how you describe the set of beliefs that are being practiced.
  10. JeffHouston

    JeffHouston Well-Known Member

    Well said Don.

    My sex life is better than I could have hoped for. Seeing Deanna own and exercise her sexuality in whatever way she wants is the most satisfying and powerful thing that I have experienced. She is amazing and I am thrilled.

  11. DeannaHouston

    DeannaHouston Well-Known Member

    Well a little pissy. I think the contributors are knowledgeable men who took the time to respond directly to your post. We can control how we ask a question but it is distorted to try to control the answers.

    I am thinking ratprick, just does not understand the kink. There is no requiring, monogamy is a gift given, I couldn't force a cuck to be faithful.

    And I see how I am a hypocrite. And I see I how I wouldn't be a cuckoldress if I didn't love getting to fuck others and have my precious husband love me and only me.

    And I really really love it....maybe I should just get comfortable with being a hypocrite like I am comfortable being called a slut. But that will have to be a goal....
  12. bricbat

    bricbat Guest

    This was pretty much what my first long term adult relationship was like. My g.f. was very jealous of any woman that was close to me, even if there was no romantic interest on either of our parts. We together for less than a year, but she cheated on my multiple times.

    There was hypocrisy, definitely. Even though I was honest that I had no interest in anyone but her, and even though I tried to be understanding about her wanting to spend time with other guys, it just wasn't working. She would get really pissed if I even just barely hinted at her with another guy (her b.f.f. told me everything), she would get pissed if I told her that she was free to make her own decisions. In other words, she was cheating, didn't want me to know, and got angry if I didn't angrily accuse her of cheating because to her that meant that I didn't care enough about her. And on top of all of it, she was plain nasty, like I said, to any woman close to me.

    My wife, on the other hand, has a completely different outlook.

    Your mileage may vary.
    christinebitg and JeffHouston like this.
  13. saturn

    saturn Super Moderator Staff Member

    And here we see one of the reasons Deanna loves Jeff!
    JeffHouston likes this.
  14. saturn

    saturn Super Moderator Staff Member

    The way I see it, for a large majority of this population there is no hypocrisy. For it is by far the norm for a man to want this and to bring the woman into it. In those scenarios the woman doesn't demand anything. She accepts the offer to sleep with other men and also accepts the promise that he won't sleep with other women.

    I'm sure there are a few, maybe even more than a few, women who do bring it up, desire it, or perhaps demand being allowed to sleep with others while her man cannot. But it is far from the majority in the experience I have with this forum, lifestyle, etc. Plus, I'm still not convinced that hypocrisy is the right definition here. Double Standard would fit better.
  15. Hawke82

    Hawke82 Guest

    Personally, I don't find this lifestlye hypocritical at all. A cuckold is turned on by his wife, and seeing (or knowing) she has sex with other men.

    When we first started out, we were exploring. We married young (literally high school sweethearts), and we were eachother's first sexual partner. When we decided to explore sex with other people after 8 years of marriage, we first decided she should seduce a friend of ours she was attracted to, and then a few months later, I "let' a co-worker seduce me after a party. We both enjoyed those encounters, but felt seperate encounters were potentially risky, so we tried swinging, and swapped partners several times with two different couples. While I can say we both enjoyed those experiences, and we both learned things from our new sexual partners, there were issues that we both had to deal with.

    I found I was distracted during these encounters, because while I was with the other wife, I was far more interested in knowing what my wife was doing with the other man. I didn't ignore my partner, and in fact one of the wive's commented that I fucked like man that had just gotten out of prison. Thinking about my wife was such a turn on for me, that my passion was definately redirected at the woman I was with, and she definitely benefited from it. The problem was, I was using her as a substitute for my wife. As hot as these women were, they didn't hold a candle to my wife in my desires.

    My wife also enjoyed herself with these men, but she was distracted for the same reason, wondering what I was doing with the wife of her current partner. The big difference was, while the idea of her having sex was an erotic distraction for me, for her knowing I was having sex with another woman was a jealous distraction, which affected her ability to really let go.

    We both soon agreed that swinging wasn't for us, and my wife suggested we just stop, but was surprised when I said I didn't want to stop, I just wanted us to focus on her having other partners. I told her I had no problem with her continuing to have sex with other men, and in fact was very turned on by the idea.

    Once she realized I was not only okay with her sleeping with other men, but was in fact wildly turned on by it, it released any guilt she may have had about continuing, while expecting me to return to being the faithful monogamous husband.

    I have to say, my sexuality is completely focused on her, and her pleasure is more important to me, than my own. That doesn't mean I wish or would easily accept being cut of sexually, but I does mean I'm more than okay with the disparity of our one sided open marriage. The best times of our marriage, have been when she's had a regular sexual partner that was often having sex with her as often or more than I am. I'm more turned on, and she's more sexually satisfied, so everyone wins! What's so hypocritical about that?
  16. This is an excellent post. I can totally relate to and agree with all of your very well expressed comments (and I love your avatar).
    Hawke82 and JeffHouston like this.
  17. DSale

    DSale Guest

    Surely cuckolding only works if both parties enjoy it and are fully and honest. If one of them feels any part of it is hypocrisy (or any other negative emotion) then it's not working and they should stop.

    I am not sure what the OP is wanting to hear, and I am uncomfortable with his anger, so this will be my last post in this thread
  18. mousehungcuck

    mousehungcuck Member

    Who sounds pissy now?

    Great vocabulary, by the way. Do you have a Webster's Thesaurus app? I like those synonyms. I may adopt them in my handle.

    Lastly, I understand it perfectly. I'm interested in the psychology of cuckolding, so I think it's an interesting question. You got pissy about it. I've been on this forum for years lady. Check my history before you accuse me of something you know nothing about.
    michael1987 likes this.
  19. DeannaHouston

    DeannaHouston Well-Known Member

    Thanks, I do have a great vocabulary. No I don't have a Thesauraus app, I find it relatively easy to insult rodents and men.

    You being on a forum for years means nothing, it does not mean you understand. We all gain greater understanding from those who take the time to respond to us, from them we learn more about life and ourselves. You asked, to learn more. You then insulted and were dismissive of the men who took the time to respond to you. That does not show a desire to learn. You want to answer your own question, Only wanting people to agree with you is not leaving you open for learning.

    For those who understand, No explanation is needed. I wish you well.
  20. mousehungcuck

    mousehungcuck Member

    Well, I'll have the last word here since it is my thread. I really don't care if the hypocritical slut reads it or not. I never insulted anyone. They substituted one question for another so I tried to get the discussion back on track. Nobody answered the question. They, particularly your husband, proceeded to lecture me on sexuality, cuckolding and why it works for their marriage. That's a different discussion altogether and I don't need a lecture, thank you very much.
    michael1987 likes this.

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