For some reason I find him sleeping with three of your woman a turn off. I don't know maybe it is just me. If he is such a dud in bed I would think the women would have spread that around. I don't understand your present wife doing that to you but I am not into much humiliation and I would have got revenge on him and made It clear to my wife that she crossed the line. But that is me not you and you and your wife's life is yours not mine.