My Journey on the Cuckold Roller Coaster

Discussion in 'Real Life Experiences' started by Pulley, May 22, 2013.

  1. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    All comments on the following would be appreciate.This is not fiction. I am happy to answer any questions and elaborate on any detail. It is all real, it is who I am. I don't care to be judged, I am very happy with who I am, if you find you don't like it, there are a world of stories on the internet, go find one that tickles your fancy.

    I have never been one for expressing myself in the written word, if you have any tips or suggestions please send me a PM. I would like to have a go at writing my own cuckold fiction one day. Probably I should stick to my day job. ;)



    I am new to this forum but not to the lifestyle and over coming weeks I would like the opportunity to tell my story. There are lots of good experiences and some not so good... perhaps others new to this lifestyle can learn from my experiences and mistakes and become better at giving their wives the pleasure they need and deserve as a result.

    How did I get like this? Why do I stay? Why do I need to feel these crazy emotions? The cuckold conundrum is the contradiction that rules my private life.

    In this I feel (and hope) I may have something in common with many of you who visit this site.

    For me it started at youth group.

    A pimply faced 15 year old. Awkward and uncomfortable.
    My virginity written across my face like a giant billboard.
    Horny as a ten peckered owl.

    I was hit on by a girl who I can only say (at the time you understand) was the most beautiful creature ever to have been created. I was instantly in love. She gave me my first kiss and took me under her wing. She had experience in bed and liked to talk about the men that she had been with. She also made it clear that I would not be getting sex. Not at first that would come later. If I was good.

    I wanted sex.

    I was good.

    I learnt how to please her in more ways than I have had hot dinners. Sometimes she would let me come, but to sex, her legs were closed. After six months she had me totally. I would do anything she demanded, wanted or hinted at. Worse still she knew it.
    She decided it was time for me to give her what she really wanted, like those men before me had done. It was a big deal, the night was planned weeks in advance. It was built up to such a huge thing.

    On the night though it did not happen.
    She wanted it. You could see it in her eyes in her every movement and you could hear it on her breath.

    But I could not do it. I was neither big nor hard enough to do that one thing. I pleased her several times before she went to sleep but she made it very clear how dissatisfied she was.

    Soon she had another man. She delighted in telling me how he had fucked her several different ways on their first date, on the side of the road and she would not be needing me anymore.

    I was devastated. I was heartbroken, I did not understand it but I was also aroused. The girl I worshiped, the girl I wanted to have every pleasure, was getting the pleasure she wanted and it was not with me.

    For a while she kept me on as her part time play thing and servant, but I was soon discarded.

    She did some horrible things to me that I will never forgive. Humiliated me in front of my peers and accused me of things she knew full well I was not even capable of doing, purely for her own amusement, knowing I was completely unable to say or do anything. But she taught me a lot. Especially the importance (and methods) of pleasing your lady, in whatever way you can.

    What followed was about 4 years of relationships, they all started amazingly well, but ended similarly. When it came down to it, I did not have what it took to fuck. Sure I could give pleasure in other ways, Lots of other ways, but not fuck. The primordial act, that every woman seemed to need, desire and eventually demand, before moving on to someone who could.

    Enough for now… It gets better soon I promise….
     
    Last edited: May 22, 2013
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  2. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    Well, its been a while....

    It all changed for me when I met my gorgeous wife. She is sexy, amorous and a lifelong friend. She was patient with me and helped bring me to life, whilst I had sort of had sex before, I really feel I lost my virginity to her. She taught me to please her in many ways including sodomy. She has always preferred that. I think due to my size she does not get any pleasure from normal sex.

    It became clear to me very early on that I needed the humiliation. I dearly wanted her to get the pleasure she so often talked about when discussing her previous relationships.

    We often talked about other people in our relationship. It was clear she wanted more than I could deliver in key areas of our sex life. There were a couple of mff threesomes during the early days, though I was not really permitted to participate, I was there, but technically not a threesome.

    It came to a head one December after we had been together for about 10 years. At her work Christmas party she spent the whole night dancing with her boss, flirting and touching, while I looked on, wrestling with my emotions. She often talked about this man during sex. I would sodomize her while she lay on her belly and touched herself, telling me how much she fantasized about her boss having his way with her.

    She went home with him in front of all her colleagues, leaving me in the carpark.

    We had made some rules about her spending time with other men. Like just about every wannabe cuck I had made the rules... you all know the ones...

    No kissing, no unprotected sex etc.

    I guess men think that being cuckolded is their fantasy so they get to make the rules. That right there is a trap for the uninitiated. When a woman comes out and dominates the first thing that will happen is she will set the rules. Before they even left the Christmas party they were kissing like two people possessed. God knows how many times he fucked her that night and the next day. For a while she tried to tell me she had used protection, but eventually the truth came out. He had claimed her has his own and filled her with his seed countless times.

    I was devastated, but like most of you on this forum I had never had a bigger and more full erection.

    The horse had bolted and there was no putting it back in its pen.

    This was the start of my true cuckolding, to be continued.
     
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  3. rokrob

    rokrob New Member

    Thanks for telling this story. Yes, the rules we agree with our wives seem to go out the window when they get their hands on a new cock and they don't like to reveal everything (or at least that's true for my wife). I hope you can carry on and let us know what changes happened after she had her boss.
     
  4. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    So yeah, my wife fucked her boss. Every cucks fantasy, but the reality is doing so openly and in the knowledge of every other employee was not the brightest idea for either of them and it was not very long before my wife was forced to look for another job...

    It worked out well for her though as she ended up working in the same field but with better pay. Things were going great for a few years. Work wise not cuck wise... Her job as an emergency response coordinator required mostly shift work. This put considerable strain on our relationship and when a very fit man, Steve, joined her team, they hit it off very well.
    At the time my cuck fantasies went into overdrive. She was clearly taken with this guy. If you have followed any of my posts you will know that my wife is very much into sodomy, with me anyway... I am not a big boy in that department and anal play has always been the best way for me to give her pleasure and that full sensation...
    For a few weeks she was horny every single time we were together after she finished work, and I would take her from behind and she would talk about how badly she needed her pussy fucked. How much Steve turned her on. Pretty soon they were texting each other all the time, and it was not long after that she told me she was going to fuck him.

    They had it all planned. She was starting a shift at 7pm and he finished at 9pm... except he would not leave. Her shift did not finish until 5am. Nobody else worked the graveyard shift and the whole level in the building would be deserted. As long as it was a quiet night they would have plenty of time. She told me how much she needed this. That it would just be sex, nothing more. I bought here a pack of good strong condoms and she promised to make him wear them. There would be no kissing or intimacy. he would text me regularly and call when she could. This was just about her catching up on many years of dissatisfying sex with me. It was clear it was my fault. She would not need to do this if I had been a better man where it counted.

    She gave me a razor and a basin of warm water and had me shave her bare. She had never shaved for me and it was exciting to see her beautiful pussy all naked and smooth. I had never wanted her more. She got dressed in the bathroom, taking in a small bag containing lingerie she had bought just for him. I was not allowed to see it.

    She had been giddy with excitement all day. I had never seen her so eager to go to work. She had packed a bag with pillows and blankets and with nothing more than a kiss on the cheek for me, she was gone.
     
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  5. ellensburgcuckold

    ellensburgcuckold New Member

    We had made some rules about her spending time with other men. Like just about every wannabe cuck I had made the rules... you all know the ones...

    No kissing, no unprotected sex etc.

    I guess men think that being cuckolded is their fantasy so they get to make the rules. That right there is a trap for the uninitiated. When a woman comes out and dominates the first thing that will happen is she will set the rules. Before they even left the Christmas party they were kissing like two people possessed. God knows how many times he fucked her that night and the next day. For a while she tried to tell me she had used protection, but eventually the truth came out. He had claimed her has his own and filled her with his seed countless times.

    I was devastated, but like most of you on this forum I had never had a bigger and more full erection.

    The horse had bolted and there was no putting it back in its pen.

    This was the start of my true cuckolding, to be continued.[/QUOTE]

    This part really resonates with me, together with "careful what you wish for". My Mistress Sarah has taken me far beyond my limited initial desires, and I know she is still interested in going even further. A few days ago she told me "once you give a girl some candy, you can't take it back"
     
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  6. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    Well its been a while...

    Here i am... the chores are half done and she is out in her little black dress. I am doing my best not to text her every few minutes or call. And trying to distract myself enough... I have just mopped the house and have some tidying to do in the bedroom but in my part of the world it is nearly 10:30 PM and the night out is still young... she has been drinking and whether she picks up or not I don't expect her to be home tonight. For a catch up on the last 7 days in my life see this thread: http://www.cuckoldsforum.com/emotional-support/13422-low-ebb.html.. update.. Just got a text... "having a great time" ?????????????/ That is a good sign yeah? Hell yeah!


    Ok so I will try and pick up where I left off above... for what it is worth I may as well finish the tale... It will be a bit skewed in the telling because I am not thinking very clearly tonight and the world is a happy place full of rainbows, sunshine and lollipops and I had forgotten how this feels!


    OK mind back ontot the story. So Steve. Yeah that was the start of her affair.

    Her affair? yes she entered into it with my consent, yes I knew what was going on. I tried once more to set the rules. I was adamant that this was my fantasy. this was my thing. This got me off like nothing else. But I did want her to wear protection and I did not want them to become emotionally attached.

    Dumb really. Considering the history between us.

    It was not long before I discovered that from the first night he had refused to wear condoms. She was not on the pill and he never pulled out. Nor was she interested in same though after a few scary months she did start on the pill.

    She would come home from night shift most nights exhausted as I walked out the door for work. He used to bruise her and mark her , he would leave distinct finger marks on her thighs when he fucked her doggy style and she would be sore all around her pussy every day so hard did he fuck her.

    Things started to get out of hand for me. He got jealous and made her promise to stop sleeping with me. As she worked most nights and as she rarely let me use her vagina anyway, this to her translated into letting me fuck her anally while she masturbated, but I was never allowed to come. Always when she was finished I had to pull out. Wash and go to sleep...

    I did not seep for nights on end and it was apparent that her bull had a pretty powerful hold on her. He had never fucked her anally or shown interest and she was ashamed to ask him to, but in every other way he owned her. She did everything, and I mean everything he wanted. Even making me take the kids away for a weekend so he could fuck her in every possible position and in every room in our house for a whole weekend.

    It was at this time I lost it. I could not cope anymore... In hindsight and in fantasy I know how hot it is. I still masturbate fantasizing about it. But at the time the reality became unbearable and I demanded they end it for the first time. At first she refused, but soon she agreed for the sake of our kids and for our marriage she would end it. End of story right?

    Well yeah, for about a year maybe it was. I left the cuckold fantasy behind in a clouded wall of emotional pain and hurt.

    We were becoming a couple again. We were seeing a Councillor at the time and things were very strained between us though she rarely got close to me physical. In that year she got Pregnant. She was devastated, but I though it was a good thing and consoled her that everything was OK and it was all part of the healing process.

    When she got pregnant I should have suspected something. We had only had sex once in the month it happened. At the time I though we were unlucky. the first time we had had vaginal sex for about a year unprotected and she gets pregnant... Just unlucky right?

    Anyhow after the pregnancy and not long after the birth I found her phone and should not of looked. The text was brief, and the name of the sender was one of her girlfriends but it was immediately obvious to me she had continued the affair and it was about to continue again.

    I demanded that she stop, and there are a lot of stories of this period I am not going to go into tonight. Suffice to say it was extremely painful and I could not embrace the situation. She would not leave me for him and yeah... she pretty much could not stop for a ling time. During this period he started having Anal sex with her...

    I don't want to go there now, maybe another time...

    I stayed with her. Of course I did. I knew I had behaved badly. I knew it was not my place to make her stop, and yeah it was all pretty messed up. councilling continued. she was forced to loose all contact with him and he moved interstate.

    About 12 months of coldness went by and it was at that time I started getting the familiar cuckold fantasies....

    At that time I had a lot of regret and I did right up till I joined this forum. What if I had not tried to stop her? what if she had continued to cuckold me instead of turning it into an affair.

    She had little choice, I was the cuckold and I was trying to set the rules alone... the rules need to be mutual in some cases, but the cuckold lifestyle is not just the man, it is the woman too. She was not doing it for me, she was doing it with me. It went to far at some point... anyhow I am rambling.

    The short of it is, we took a wrong path at some point. We left the lifestyle and for many years I could not of regretted it more. There was no going back....

    Well enough for tonight.. I feel better for blurting it out despite the lack of details for you lot at home.

    this period up until a week ago has been a long period of breakdown of my cuckold rollercoaster, but right now I am on the clickety clack to the summit of the first big hill of a brand new ride. The adrenalin is flowing, the heart is missing beats and I cannot wait for the release into free-fall to see where it is taking us this time!
     
    Last edited: May 24, 2014
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  7. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    Well here we are again....


    Another weekend, as I updated in my other Thread, "A low Ebb" She had a good night out and met a guy... she refused to give him her number promising to be back at the club this week....

    All week she has been excited and happy. Back to her old self... telling me how much she is looking forward to seeing him again and how much she wants to fuck this guy. Apparently he is a tradesman and very well built.... How happy she is with me for letting her do this again.... (like I have a choice, but hey I am not complaining)

    She left an hour and a half ago and no texts... that could be a good or a bad thing... I am not going to push... getting obsessive at this point is unlikely to be productive. She told me before she left, if he is there she won't be home tonight... I don't think that is very likely, but she was pretty clear on the subject....

    So people, what more do you want to know about my wife? Anyone have any suggestions on how I can get her to let me take some pictures to share with you lot??? she is dead against it, but I would really love to share my own hot wife with you all.
     
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  8. saturn

    saturn Super Moderator Staff Member

    wow, worth the read... I do have one question though... was the kid she got pregnant with yours? I couldn't tell from the story...
     
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  9. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    Thank you for the comment it is appreciated... She went out last night and came home early. Apparently she saw the guy she is chasing again and gave him her number but he got scared off when he heard she was married... she was more than a little bummed... but you never know, apparently they kissed and dance together for a while and he asked if they could meet up sometime next week. She was pretty sure he was no longer interested though... If you saw my wife... no red blooded male would knock back a chance at sleeping with her married or not.

    I am a bit backed up today, last night after she got home she made me massage her back and sodomize her while she masturbated... I say sodomize but she told me I was not to come, I more had to just stay insider her without moving... She can be quite brutal when I don't do as I am told and she was in one of those moods. It was about the hardest thing I have ever done not coming even though I was not moving... especially when she murmured his name as her tight arse orgasmed around my little cock. Memorable stuff! I know it won't last long if she starts fucking him, she won't need me anymore and I will not be allowed inside her for however long it lasts. I am happy to make the most of what I can get now.

    She also told me the first thing she wants to do is get on her knees for him and give him pleasure... She knows how jealous that makes me because she gives fantastic head, but she never ever ever does that for me... only in the early days, I used to wake up some nights in the first few years and she would be sucking my cock. She has not given me head in over 10 years though and she knows how much I want her to. She used to suck her old BF all the time. I am really jealous that this stranger has more hope than me. He will be a dick not to call her... his loss though.

    The last thing she said was that she is going on the pill and has no intentions of using condoms with this guy. The only guy she has ever slept with with a condom is me... last time she fucked other guys she lied to me and did not use condoms... Yes I know the risks but at least she is not lying to me this time. It is what it is. Not for everyone. Not really for me, but it is her thing and I accept it for what it is.

    Regarding your question... Is the child mine? Really I don't know and I tend to doubt it. I think I was set up to think the child is mine and I have my reasons for that. But to be absolutely clear. The child is mine in every possible respect, no matter what story the genes tell. I could not love my children more.
     
    Last edited: May 31, 2014
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  10. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    So she went out Friday and gave this guy her number. The silly boy has not messaged her... Silly boy is going to miss a lot of fun... Probably because she mentioned she was married...

    I am a little bit bummed, would of been nice for her to get a quick reintroduction to the lifestyle. Naturally I had my hopes up too. Never mind she is open to the idea again and things between us have not been this good in a very long time. I get home from work and she demands that I take her to bed and "please" her... I like it!
     
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  11. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    Well its been a whiles since my last update.

    Since my last post, nothing has happened, and likely nothing will continue to happen... But...
    I discovered today that she has been back on an online dating site and been chatting to a guy...

    She has recently gone to a fair bit of effort to get back into shape and she is looking super sexy. she is playing the game in bed more. I am pretty excited by the faintest prospect that something may get her back in the sack with a man... she has taken to calling me her "little boy" and that is pretty sexy to me to...

    Our anniversary is coming up in a few weeks... I like to imagine she will be going on a date with her boyfriend and having the best anniversary present ever, while I stay home and tidy the house...

    Anyhow, sorry for the nothing post about nothing, but I still love this forum and the stories of the people on it and hopefully I will have more of a tail to tell in the not to distant future...
     
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  12. saturn

    saturn Super Moderator Staff Member

    It's not a nothing post about nothing. It's not realistic for anybody to expect that your wife is going to get strange dick every morning, day, night, afternoon - dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick*. Posts like yours just now are more than welcome to couch the fantasy part of this just for awhile and letting us into the reality of it all.

    Still, your post had a ton of good material in it. Ok, so she didn't fuck or suck a guy, but you certainly had good information and insight to share. The chatting, the "little boy" comments, getting into shape (THIS is a good sign). It all adds up to an excellent post, if I do say so myself.

    *Bonus points if anybody can tell me (from memory - no searching!) where I quoted that from! :)
     
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  13. stuckcuck

    stuckcuck Well-Known Member

    Reservoir dogs
     
  14. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    I just thought it about time I updated.
    As the years tick by, the reality of being cuckolded again becomes less and less likely, whilst my obsession with the fantasy gets stronger and stronger.
    We talk about it still, but it is less and less common. I always seem to get carried away and push too far.
    I still like checking in on the forum and hearing the great stories, and thinking back to what things used to be like for us. I have so many regrets about breaking things back them it is impossible to put my feelings into words. I wish I could turn back time.
    Thanks to all who have great and exciting stories to tell. I may never be one of them again, but I do appreciate the forum and its contributors.
     
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  15. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member


    Thanks for the Update.
    Don't give up Hope, you've been Patient, continue to do so. One Never knows what tomorrow has in store. Or has Tom Hanks said in Castaway " Tomorrow the Sun will rise and who knows what the Tide may bring ".

    Just keep being the Supportive, Understanding, Submissive Cuckold. But With Patience and Persistence.

    Best of Luck and stick around here too.
     
  16. ozybigal

    ozybigal New Member

    tell her to get a bf where u become more involved and some dp threesome action get to watch etc
     
  17. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    The Vibe I get is the OPPOSITE. To ME, it sounds like Pulley has LEARNED from his past Mistakes. Therefore has Progressed, into Understanding that SHE Needs to have Her Freedom to make Their Cuckold Lifestyle Much More about HER. If he tells her Anything I would advise, it be That.
    IMHO
     
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  18. Pulley

    Pulley Member

    Well a bit of an update. Nothing has happened and in a way nothing continues to happen....
    Except... recently my wife has been really getting into talking about her former bf. she brings him up during sex. She has even started throwing in some new play. It’s pretty exciting given the 9+ years of faithful behaviour. Our relationship has been rocky and recently we had an argument and I started sleeping in another room. Then she sent me a message telling me I had to look after the kids the following night. I was angry at her but she had me hook line and sinker.
    I could not resist and the next morning asked why. She told me she was going to a party with a friend.
    She , In Fact we have not been to a “party’ of any kind in years, and of course I was not invited.
    It drove me wild. It instantly rekindled my desires and got me all fired up. I pampered her and stroked her all afternoon. I massaged her feet and ran my fingers over her from head to toe. I caressed her until she was moaning with pleasure, doing and touching her in every way she loves! Anyhow then I said something stupid and she got angry and the argument flared up again. She got angry at me and left for the party pretty pissed off....

    To be continued....
     

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