it finally happened last night, sure a few people suspected my wife was cheating on me, maybe they were spotted out, an innocent meal somewhere or in a store. last night was different, they went together to a party at which many of our oldest friends were in attendance. holding hands, kissing, leaving no doubt he was not just a friend. it will be humiliating to face them the next time, and certainly awkward, do i admit to knowing or play the unknowing fool. how did she explain? i will have to ask about the entire evening, but she won't be home for hours and as she will be tired she will dismiss my attempts to learn more. she makes her own rules and will tell me that no one suspects and they went as "friends",but our friends are not stupid and i am sure we were the topic of the party. i have just started seeing a therapist but i am not sure if she is equipped to deal with this as my chosen lifestyle just as i am not sure if i can handle being openly and publicly cuckolded. on one hand i find the public humiliation exciting but i still have a role i play as a man with my buddies and i am certain to be questioned as to why i don't just leave my cheating wife. 2009 will be an interesting year and i can only hope i will both understand and find what i am lookig for. i love my beautiful wife and support her extramarital needs, now i will find out if i have the balls to say that in public.