I am new to this site, so perhaps I posted in the wrong section, but I need assistance. I am a single, 45 year-old man, never married and I take the train from the suburbs to NYC every weekday. The train gets crowded and people always have to stand in the aisles. Since I get on at the first stop, I always get a seat and I always sit in the same three-seat row, taking the aisle seat. By the time we get to the next stop, there is always one seat open in the middle (next to me). About three weeks ago, an attractive blonde (on the shorter side) got on the train and asked to sit in the middle seat. I got up and let her sit there. Since there was no seat for her man, he stood. At some point a few minutes later, I realized that, as a cuck, I should have gotten up and offered him my seat. It is my place to do that. It bothered me the whole trip. When we got to the city and about to get off the train, I quietly apologized for not letting her man sit next to her. I don’t think she really understood, so she said “don’t worry about it”. I then said that next time I will. Again, don’t think she really thought about it. The whole rest of the day, I was really angry with myself for blowing it. I should have gotten up and given him my seat. It stayed with me and I vowed, from that day on, to always get to the station early to ENSURE I got my seat, so that I could give it up to him next time. About a week later, the same situation presented itself and I got up and told him he could sit next to her. He asked if I was sure and I said yes and he thanked me (I wish he hadn’t). Out of the corner of my eye I saw a couple of the people that I make small talk with on the train platform, look at me totally bewildered that I got up and gave my seat away to a man. I didn’t look back at them and stood for the entire trip. I was relieved that I was able to make amends for screwing up the first time. This is what I’m good for. When we got to the city, I let them in front of me as they left the aisle. I could see the girl give her man what looked like a cross between a smile and a laugh to her man. That right there was my reward. Fast forward to this morning, the same situation presented itself. She asked to sit in the middle seat and there was her man. She looked at him. I didn’t get up out of embarrassment for those other people I mentioned seeing me do this for a second time. He did get a seat right behind us, but I still felt shitty. I feel like not letting him sit next to her this time negated me letting him sit there last time. I actually typed “I wanted to let him sit next to you” on my phone and left it visible to her for the whole second half of the trip, but she never looked over. So I am again kicking myself, but I also don’t want the embarrassment that comes along with such a cuck move. What do I do the next time?? Please help.