being a man

Discussion in 'Emotional Support' started by bricbat, Sep 15, 2018.

  1. bricbat

    bricbat Guest

    Because I want to be. I love her and she loves me. It's just the dynamic of our life together. It's always been this way, up and down.
    It's kind of ironic, because so many guy out there fantasize about dominant women taking control, and here I am with a real life 'boss wife' and it's a lot harder in real life than in fantasy.

    I haven't been here much lately because there hasn't been much to report. But over the past week or so . . . .
    I ran out of deodorant. She told me it's silly for me to run out to the store to buy some when she had some I could use. So I did. Then she said that there's no point in buying two different kinds. Since then, I've been wearing Secret deodorant. Same thing happened with soap. I used to buy men's body wash, but she didn't like the fragrances, so now I use her soap, which is basic Dove with floral/rose fragrances.

    Three nights ago she said that it wakes her up when I toss and turn at night. Since then, I've been sleeping on a mattress on the floor beside the bed. She gave me a pink satin pillow and matching pink satin comforter. It's not a true pink, more of a purplish pink. But . . . it's pink.

    I got my evening chores done early, otherwise I wouldn't be online now. Plus, she went out for a bit. A girlfriend has a date and the guy told her to bring a friend. And since it's just a favor for her friend, my wife decided to go out rather than sit at home.
     
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  2. neutral

    neutral New Member

    I'm also confused by the dynamics here. I find stuff like this hot as hell:

    And let's not forget how when we're out together (usually she's already out and I meet her somewhere) she's already socializing with both men and women who are from that more assertive, alpha-type lifestyle that we can't afford, and the men touch her with a lot of familiarity---hands on the small of her back, a quick slip of an arm around her waist, etc.

    ... but the perpetual disregard and disrespect outside of a consensual Ds relationship is confusing. I don't think it makes you less of a man, and I've read a bunch of your posts, but I also don't understand how it works for you. I'd like to understand it better.

    Edited to add: I just saw your reply above after I posted mine. I understand your relationship a little better now, but it still seems mysterious.
     
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  3. Worth It

    Worth It Well-Known Member

    And one can be a sissy and not a cuckold. Many guys put up with that.

    Audrey and I are equals overall in life, and accept things that please the other, like being nonmonogamous. Actually, it's something that makes us both happy with no domination or humiliation.
     
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  4. bricbat

    bricbat Guest

    She has been much more affectionate toward me since about two nights ago. I was giving her a footrub and she invited me to have sex with her. I couldn't get hard enough. I barely got the condom on. I got between her legs and tried to penetrate her. I asked, "This isn't working, is it?"
    She said, "No. It's not."
    I said, "Now I'm going to be frustrated."
    She said, "Don't blame me for it. This isn't my fault. I gave you a chance."
    I said, "I know. I'm not."

    After that, it's as if she let me get closer to her. She's nicer to me, more affectionate, wants to talk to me more. She seems happier around me. I feel like being a beta is what makes her want me.

    We watch rom-coms together, we clothes-shop together. We look at Pinterest home decorating together. She buys food for the meals she wants me to prepare. When she gets home from work, I stop cooking dinner so I can take her boots off for her so she can relax.
     
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  5. Worth It

    Worth It Well-Known Member

    When that happens (usually after blowing the first load) to me or one of the guys who we play with, my wife, his wife, or one of the other girls who we play with will suck it up. The women particularly like a sloppy dick with pussy juices on it. They like it and it works. Hardly a dick out there that won't get hard with it in a woman's mouth and some tits being squeezed.
     
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  6. nevertoolate

    nevertoolate New Member

    It is futile to insist on absolutes in human behavior. Both women and men adjust their dominant and submissive behaviors depending on the roles they have to play in life. Traditional work roles are going to remain the same for as long as I can see, but "traditional" male/female relationships are beginning to get wide open. Individually we transition from dominant to submissive roles throughout the day with the people we interact with. It is a role playing fluidity that makes society work with less friction and conflict.

    We move back and forth on the scale of dominance to submission every day. Choosing to do this with your wife makes you no more or less of a man than it does out in the "real world." Fret not, but savor the exciting times we live in!
     
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  7. Bartleby

    Bartleby Well-Known Member

    this happens to me a lot. Just this morning, it happened again. However, my wife does not get frustrated at all. (any more?) She found this technique where I lie on her and she is rubbing my penis and her clit at the same time. I don't get hard and I won't ejaculate, but I have very strong sensations. My wife calls this "giving me female orgasms". It is very intense and pleasurable, in some ways it is even better than real fucking. My wife gets an orgasm doing that.

    Maybe she can try this with you. In any case, sex should be centred around the pleasure of the woman. If you don't get hard enough, just pleasure her till orgasm, then the point of sex has been accomplished.
     
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  8. Bartleby

    Bartleby Well-Known Member

    I have come to the conclusion that cuckolding really does not make a man less manly. Not at all. I see it as a simple fact that some men are happy if their wives are faithful to them, others prefer a promiscuous wife. Nothing wrong with either choice. I just wish I had realised earlier in life that I prefer my partner to be fucking around.
     
  9. DaveA.

    DaveA. New Member

    From my perspective it makes me more of a man. I'll explain. Around 15 years ago there was a younger man I worked with who one day came in and went into a rant about how his fiance "betrayed" him by "cheating." In his mind that made her a "whore" so he "dumped her ass." It broke my heart, not for him, but for her. Obviously she loved him so much she wanted to be his wife, but she also enjoyed sex with other guys. Rather than accept it and work out some groundrules together -- like her giving him extra reassurance of her love for him -- he responded in a primitive, sort of caveman-like way as if HER pussy was HIS property. To me that's not manly, it's insecure, immature and, yes, weak. If I knew him better I would've told him about my marriage with Kathy and how my being her cuckold has worked out for us. Obviously it's been a struggle at times, I think that's true of all marriages, but I've never felt that my manhood is threatened by Kathy having a sex-life that's hers alone. There's no reason why it should. I ought to add that, since high school, I've had relationships with other girls who were having sex with other guys. They adored me for accepting that.
     
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2020 at 5:31 PM
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  10. SmallFry

    SmallFry Active Member

    I am generally alpha except in the bedroom when a "superior" better endowed guy is involved. My tiny penis reduces me to beta status for me, any female(s) present and of course the elevated status of the other guy.
     
  11. UCUM666

    UCUM666 Well-Known Member

    Back when I was still married, my wife and I had a MFM and we had a lot of this other-guy-with-huge-cock talk in our sex play. Where it went wrong is when she started cheating on me. Lies, deception, and worst of all, I wasn't involved in what she was doing. We ended up getting divorced for this (and other typical marriage gone bad reasons). Looking back now, I wonder if maybe I was a bit more forward looking and mature, I could have dealt with this behavior on her part and think about how this could have developed over time to something that was beneficial sexually for me as well. But, bottom line is, I think being honest in relationships trumps all, so I don't beat myself up too much over the split. Anyway, you sound really open minded and mature. Congrats on that as it seems to have lent itself well to you achieving the kind of sex life that suits you best!! JS
     

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