Discussion in 'Methods, Techniques and Advice' started by bricbat, Feb 9, 2012.
Deanna feels the same
@JeffHouston, she used the same philosophy in college. "The only reason to visit friends in college..." It's why I'll never know how many men she was with, because "those" don't count.
I think a lot of women count their lovers this way.
I am a terrible counter, as a young person I made up all kinds of rules for it not counting...like if you couldn't take the whole cock-didn't count, if the guy didn't cum in me-didn't count, if there was more than one guy-didn't count, of course oral-didn't count, if I only did a stripper slide-didn't count, if they only fucked my clit and put it in a little-didn't count,.....My first husband wanted to marry a virgin.....he ended up having sex with me before marriage, but that didn't count because he got me a promise ring. I also never counted the guys I fucked while "promised" to him or married to him. And I just "forgot" everyone I fucked before him.
Jeff is not a number counter, that has been good for me in some ways. He didn't want to know my number....and honestly by the time I started dating Jeff I couldn't have given a truthful number.
I was trying to get to this years number a couple of days ago....but it is hard to remember them all. Especially the random one off ones. And none of the OM (orgasmic meditation) guys count because they only touch my pussy with their hands.
@DeannaHouston what is a stripper slide?
I never asked for my wife's number--she demanded that I tell her mine, and then she told me only about the guys she thought I would already know about: her ex, my best friend, and the guy she was with the night before we started dating.
I think there are a couple of ways to do a "stripper slide" but a common one...picture the guys laying on his back (on a massage table or bed)....the female (typically a sex worker) straddles his hips and slides her pussy along the length of the cock and balls without penetration. The cock is squeezed between her vagina and his abdomen. This is done until orgasam is achieved. It is one of the ways that grown men visit those massage places and get a happy finish...and tell themselves that they didn't have sex outside of their marriage.
I have also never asked for my Wife's 'number', either when we were first going out together or at any time during the years of our marriage since. She is not a 'counter' of many thing things in life so I suspect that she could not have answered originally and certainly could not now. She did ask me for my 'number' immediately after we first had sex.
We had a moment of domestic bliss this evening.
The Rose Bowl is on TV. I was watching for a bit. My wife was getting ready to go out with a couple guys and a couple of her female friends.
She came into the TV room and sat down to watch for a few minutes. (She's always had a soft spot for young football players). I moved from my seat and sat on the floor beside her, with my feet tucked under me, and leaned against her leg. (Now that I look back on it, I was sitting in a rather politely feminine manner).
Then it was time for her to leave. She leaned down, kissed me, and got up to go. In a few minutes I'll get to my chores in the kitchen.
My wife is much happier overall when she has the opportunity to go out and socialize, and she's more affectionate toward me.
Whoa--this is a potential development. A couple we know is getting a divorce. The (ex)husband had always been chatty with my wife. He usually ignored me. I've mentioned him before. We'd be out together, all four of us, and he would be talking to my wife and simultaneously texting photos and messages to her. That must have been around the time that the marriage was having trouble, because his wife would be off by herself a little bit. I was simply overlooked no matter where I was.
Early this morning before I left for work, my wife saw an article in the morning newspaper about one of the college bowl games, and casually said, "Hey, look at this! Derek already texted me a picture of this article." I was a little surprised because, the separation, impending divorce, you'd think people might want to take a step back from their social lives while they lick their wounds.
Not Derek. Turns out he's ramped up his texts to my wife. And now he's available.
A few months before we were married, my wife and I were at a swimming pool. She was wearing a bikini designed to show off curves, especially ass, and she had everything she needed. I saw on a towel by myself and watched her strut around from place to place.
She came back to the towels and said, "I don't want us to have a traditional marriage." I wasn't exactly sure what she meant, and I didn't ask. If anything, the past few years have answered for me.
Talking about wives keeping (or not) a list of guys they've been with, my wife did not strictly keep count, either. But as things developed with Kevin, and then Doug (her current bull/dom) they wanted her to come up with an exact number to drive home (especially as the number increased) how much of slut she is.
It took her a few days but she methodically pieced together a list of all the guys she was with before me. She says the count of fourteen that predates our marriage is pretty damn accurate. Putting the 'after hubby' list together (27) was easy for her, since it's all just in the last five years and she's still seeing most all of them infrequently, and some regularly. She's got a tattoo of an ivy vine and leaves starting at her foot and winding up her calf. Each man is represented by a leaf. We'll never forget the number, since she occasionally updates the tattoo. It's beautifully done and many people have complimented her regarding it. To nearly everyone, it's just art. To us and her bulls, it's a testament to her infidelities.
Classes have resumed at the college and my wife is back at work. This evening she left right after I got home from work. And she was looking scrumptious and curvaceous. I asked, "When will you be home? Regular time?," which is about 8PM.
"I'm not sure. Maybe."
I said, "Oh. Did that late class start?"
She answered, "No, that doesn't start until next week."
I said, "Oh, that's right."
She said, "I'm meeting with a student after class tonight."
I said, "O.k. So you'll be--"
"Don't wait up. Make sure you get all your chores done early because I want you in bed asleep before I get home."
My wife and I were supposed to go out today. She got dressed up a little more than I expected her to, wearing her black high heel booties that zip up the back and her black leggings. She said there were too many chores for me to go with her, and she needed me to be available to clean the house in case she decided to have any guests over later.
So I'm home alone, doing house cleaning piece by piece.
This is what happened a week ago. I was cleaning up the kitchen before I started making dinner. I found a few restaurants receipts laying near the trashcan. (my wife doesn't have good aim when it comes to throwing things in the trash--but it doesn't matter to her because she's not the one who has to clean it up ).
We hadn't been out to eat for ages. Maybe close to a year? One of the receipts was from a time of day when she would normally not be at work but she told me she had to sub for someone.
I mentioned it without thinking. I said something along the lines of, 'Well, it looks like someone has been eating out a lot lately!' and laughed. It was just a little teasing.
She got really bashful and cute and girly and tried to deny that she'd been going out to eat. I was just having fun with it and pushed a little more. She was having fun with it until she wasn't. Truly, I didn't ride her over it. But once she recovered from her guilty embarrassment, she got really pissed at me for bringing it up.
My Mistress Wife reappeared and shut me down. Every time I'd open my mouth to explain myself she'd say something like, "No back-talk!" or "You are not allowed to speak to me in that tone of voice!"
"One of the problems with our marriage is that we're both submissive," my wife said yesterday, "and neither one of us wants to be a leader."
"But you are the one who's always in the lead," I replied. "You never gave me a chance to be the leader."
"I always wanted to be the second-in-command. You're just not the guy who can do that. I love you more than anything, but you're not a strong enough guy to be in charge of me," she said.
Today she told me that she had had a meeting yesterday with one of the guys at work. She said she wants to dress better for the next time they meet. So she went out clothes shopping. I assumed I was going, until she told me, "You should probably stay home. You can clean the floors while I'm gone."
So....I guess I had better get to work on that.....
There's a new development for me to keep my eye on. About ten years ago there was a Mercedes salesman who lived in our neighborhood. He was friendly, outgoing, and actually, sort of attractive. He was in his late 30s, had short blond hair and blue eyes, and always tan.
My wife and he seemed to talk. I wasn't even sure of his name, but somehow she would often run into him when she went out for walks. They talked enough for her to know that he got married late in life, the wife was in her second marriage, and....pardon my language, but my wife seemed to think the wife was a "skank." My wife knew that their short-lived marriage was on the rocks. I guess my wife became an informal support for him. The marriage tanked and they both moved away.
Weird thing is, I saw a nice black Mercedes cruise through our neighborhood twice in the past week, and I swear the guy behind the wheel could be a slightly older version of the old neighbor my wife seemed fond of.
That's classic, Bric. "Oh, by the way ...." How long ago was that? Was she already stepping out at that point or ready to do so? Sorry, I haven't read this thread yet, but she sounds like a firecracker.
A little over 20 years. 22, 23 years ago. I don't fully know the rest--we were in a long distance relationship at that point because of jobs. We only saw each other on weekends.
Yesterday my wife got a call from a friend who is having a man crisis. She lives about a 5 hour drive from us, and my wife--very uncharacteristically--decided she needed to go help her friend get over it. Through it. Whatever it. She talked to me about going, and I offered to go with her as soon as I got home from work. I left the office early, but not early enough.
On the drive home, she called my cell and asked where I was. I told her I was about 30 minutes from home. She said she was going to go ahead and make the trip by herself. By the time I got home she was already gone.
The two of them are staying in a hotel. I don't know the name of it, but my wife texts me once in a while to check in. It's in a resort area with a couple casinos, I think. I'm not sure when she's coming back, but it'll have to be before Monday because she'll have to be at work.
Hope she has a good time and can help her friend do whatever it is she needs to do. In the meantime, I've got some laundry and other stuff to catch up on.
My wife got home from work while I was still cleaning up the kitchen in preparation for making dinner. She announced that she had won an award at work. I barely had a chance to talk to her about it when her cell phone rang.
"Hello? . . .Hi! Mike! Hi! . . .Thank you! . . . .Thank you so much! . . ." and then she and her phone walked outside where I couldn't hear much more than her bubbly, enthusiastic voice.
About half an hour later she came in. I asked about the award, but she had already unloaded her good news on Mike, and she didn't have much to say. She said he wanted to take her out to celebrate, "just as a friend," she said, and it would be less dull for me to stay home because they'd probably spend the whole evening talking about work.
Since it's Friday night, I ordered myself a pizza and I guess I'll Netflix and chill.
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