1. Hey Guest, into BDSM?
    Dismiss Notice

A previous Decades Long Cuckold FINALLY begins a Second Life by Letting The Sissy Gurl Trapped withi

Discussion in 'Sissification' started by Pathedick, Jul 27, 2017.

  1. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    A previous Decades Long Cuckold FINALLY begins a Second Life by Letting The Sissy Gurl Trapped within to Live too.

    My Sissy Gurl Life Installment 1: My Journey from Previous Long Time Cuckold to Shaved Smooth Sissy Gurl. How it Began.

    Just about a year and a half ago I took the First Tentative but somehow Determined Steps towards….Well a Second Life I guess. When I took those First Steps, I REALLY had No idea where it would lead. It’s Not a Journey that’s for most people, and in fact most people would not only Not understand it, but I’d bet a fair amount would have a Very negative Opinion about it and me. But Luckily for me, first most of those people wouldn’t be on this forum, but even if some on here have that Negative Opinion, it doesn’t matter, to ME. Because though they are FREE to their Opinion but that’s all it is, Their Opinion. Plus I’m NOT writing this for them, I am writing this for those who might benefit from something in it.

    So here it goes. Most of you are probably familiar with me, Pathedick, here on the Great Cuckolds Forum. With my VERY Wordy and Detailed Thread about my Decades of my Cuckold Life. I Know it’s so Wordy that it’s not for everyone who just wants to get off. I try to Paint a Picture with my words of both what happened and what I was Thinking and Felt. Plus when I can I add my wife’s thoughts as she conveyed them to me through words or MANY times over read letters. This Thread will be the same, so due to that and it’s subject matter, probably will have a Much smaller audience that my other Thread (which appears to at least attract a Bunch of interest). Never the Less, I feel that SO MUCH has happened in way less than 2 years that I will just BURST if I don’t start posting it.

    So in my first Installment of My Cuckold Thread I posted a Very Detailed explanation of my Sexuality at a VERY early age, before I could even shoot cum but have an orgasm. It included a complete run down of the thoughts that I had about Women and Men, up to THAT point. You REALLY should go back to that 1st Installment, at Least, to gain that Perspective. That Self Perspective was built from Many Decades of Reflection (I am a VERY Reflective person) . BUT in spite of that, I even was Shocked by What I didn’t REALLY Know about ME. But suspected, and I’m sure my wife did too. But since she isn’t here to see it I can’t know. In fact, MAYBE it’s because she isn’t here anymore that I’ve Finally discovered it. How’s That?

    Well first I have a Confession to make, I believe (and hope you do too) that it is not an Unforgivable Offense. When I first started posting on this site, I logged on and had NO intention of Recalling and Writing my Cuckold Life with my wife. I in one of my FIRST posts (BEFORE I decided to tell the Cuckold World, by Cuckold Life Story) posted ONE post where I let Fantasy drift into what Actually Happened. Here is the link to it.

    http://www.cuckoldsforum.com/index.php?threads/humiliating.15468/#post-102527


    That post is Almost Entirely TRUE. With One, exception, an Important one though. And that is the part about me cleaning my friend after he fucked my wife and then him giving me the blow up doll to fuck in front of him and my wife. Though the rest is True and my wife told me to fuck the doll, it was Her alone after my friend had left and Yes after I cleaned Her and then inserted the bullet. Though She I and I MANY times talked an Fantasized about my More complete Sissification and sucking and getting Fucked by her Lovers, up to and Including some VERY Wild Sissy scenarios. We Never quite progressed past putting me in panties, thigh highs or even a all over catsuit type stocking, and sometimes a bra. She said that my little dicklet seemed it Belong in Panties instead of my man briefs. Plus her teasing me with her finger about her lover fucking me and then cumming in me to leave us both filled with his sperm. I can’t Really say WHY we never progressed in that particular aspect of our Sexual Relationship when we progressed SO Very Far in so Many aspects of it. I have MANY thoughts on why but can’t answer for sure, even for Me, let alone for Her. Because of that in spite of fantasizing about sucking Cock and being Fucked like a girl from when I was only 11 or 12 years old. My mouth and asspussy were Both Virgin and I was Completely straight, UNTIL Last year.

    What started Such a Drastic Change in My Life? Well I’ve mentioned my live in girlfriend before in my Thread, in Installment number 12 particularly. As I explained she has made some comments alluding to her NOT being into sex outside of Us, TWO (she suspected due to the Penthouse Letters collection that I couldn’t seem to part with and I used to leave the subscription cards in them marking my Favorite Cuckold stories). Plus after my wife passed, and then I met my girlfriend, between the hurt from the passing and the beginning of a more “Normal” life with my girlfriend I CONVINCED myself, that WHO I was for All those Decades was Not REALLY Who I was. I DENIED it, told myself that it was Only because my wife, starting with those Jealous nights at the disco when we were still starting out had somehow Lead me to that Path. I threw out my panties and other lingerie and MOST of my Cuckold Porn (except the Penthouse Letters which I actually stopped RE-READING, over and over and over). After she had gotten me to become a complete Cum Eater and eat EVERY load that my dicklet got to shoot (as well as her lovers from her body or pussy) I STOPPED eating cum. I Lied to myself an told myself that I didn’t Really like to do that. Worst yet before my girlfriend moved in, Knowing that she’s the Jealous type, I Purged MOST of my past Cuckold Life. Including pictures, videos, and letters. I of course wish I hadn’t now. But a few years later I Luckily discovered I had missed some. It’s only about a dozen over 30 year old Polaroid pictures but it was QUITE the find in that they are the ones that I beat off to Hundreds if Not thousands of times. Especially on that long deployment after she first cuckolded me. They are from that time when she was first cuckolding me including that night I shipped out after Don had fucked her).

    Anyway over the Years of living with my girlfriend, though I do still love her and lust her, we have had MANY BIG issues to the point that WE both became more and more Unhappy with each other. Why did we stick together, that’s beyond the scope of this thread. But with that Unhappiness, I found myself DRAWN back to WHO I Had been, and WHO I Really think I am, NOW.

    It was slow, over time. But I started to dabble back into Cuckold stories and porn. A little at a time and slowly increasing. I eventually started not only eating my cum again, but DEVOURING it. Till I was back to eating EVERY single load I shot (but only while beating off, though I wanted to eat my girlfriend after we fucked, I even offered more than once, she only had me do it once and that was when she was drunk). I Rediscovered that I was Sexually Who both I and my wife thought I was. AND then some. Then my girlfriend took a trip out of town and I remember the EXACT date, September 24th, 2012 (the reason I remember it actually has to do with football) I put on one of my girlfriends lacy pink boyshort panties under my boy clothes and even when and visited with one of my daughters and a couple of my grandkids. I remember I squated down to pick one of them up and quickly was scared that she might have spotted the pink panties peaking out). Then I went to a bar to watch the game. I couldn’t believe the way I Felt again. Comfortable, Happy and after it brought me luck (football wise) I started wearing them a lot more (especially during football games). I started out using hers’, not all of them fit me but a lot of them do.

    It was sometime later that I happened upon this Great Site (Thank You Kingbull and Saturn). Once I started posting My Cuckold Life the Memories came FLOODING back with a Vengeance. Including my (and my wife at least seemed to share them since she was always playing into them) fantasies about Cocksucking and getting Fucked like a girl since as my wife always said “You have a Horny Ass”.

    Then a bull from this site sent a Private message having to do with me needing to be fucked by a Bull and we started communicating back and forth quite a bit for awhile. With his minor prodding he help me Start to Discover and more Importantly Let Out, a LONG suppressed side of me The Sissy Gurl side of me as well as feeding my Sexual Submissive side even more that ever before.

    This is ONLY the START, there is MUCH that has happened in less than 2 Years. But I needed to Finally get this out there too. I don’t know, I don’t have a blog and maybe I should start one rather than posting it here (though I am not savvy about that stuff, I’m not even on facebook). I don’t want to bore any fellow Cucks (I’m still a cuck, even if that part of my life is over).
     
    Last edited: Jul 27, 2017
  2. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    A previous Decades Long Cuckold FINALLY begins a Second Life by Letting The Sissy :
    Gurl Trapped within to Live too.

    My Sissy Gurl Life Installment 2: Step after Step the Momentum Builds till a FAST approaching Fork in the Road is Quickly in front of me.

    There’s a Well known Robert Frost poem, “The Road Not Taken” where he comes to a Fork in the road in the woods and he “took the one less traveled by”. That is what happened to Me, early last year. I was Speeding towards a Choice. Probably not one that I hadn’t already had little opportunities to chose for Many Decades, just this time was Different. This time I had the Wisdom of those Decades of Life’s Experiences. Both the Successes and the FAILURES. The Wonderful and the Terrible. This time I was Very Unhappy and getting more so all the time in SPITE of being the Optimistic Dreamer who doesn’t quit on things like a Relationship very easily at ALL. Throw in a Pretty Impressive amount of other Life and Work Stresses . Then top it all off with my Realization that Life is Short, and at my age I KNEW getting Shorter, Faster (it seems the YEARS Fly by faster each year).

    The Sissy fantasies had Always been enough, though I had often thought about them becoming a Reality, I only came close to acting on that URGE once in the past. It was over 25 years ago and was changing jobs to one in another state. My wife and children were staying where they were till we could sell our house. Which took months. While I was by myself I was REALLY horny and went to an Adult bookstore. I didn’t usually do that but I went to one of the booths and started watching the porn (Internet still wasn’t anywhere near what it is today and we didn’t even own a computer for Several more years). While there the man in the next booth sticks his fingers through the Glory Hole and I could tell it was an invitation. I stuck my little dicklet though the hole because I was SO Horny. He sucked me but just as he started it Flashed into my mind that this was my Opportunity to FINALLY suck a Cock. Something that I had Fantasized about for over 20 years at that point (was in my early 30’s). So I pulled out of his mouth after less than a minute and did the same thing with my fingers to invite him. He stuck his mostly soft cock through the hole and I dropped down and took it in my hand. Then I stuck my tongue out and licked it Tentatively. Probably only a couple times and hadn’t even took him into my mouth when my Guilt got the better of me and I told him though the hole “I’m Sorry but I can’t do this”. And Then stood up and left.

    So last year over 25 years later my URGES were Much Stronger and Building Exponentially with my Resistance Lowered to an ALL Time LOW due to the reasons that I stated above. The FORK in the Road was approaching FAST and this time due to my Age I felt it was the LAST Time that I would have a Choice on that Road. The LAST Time Fate would EVER put that Fork in front of me. I put my head down and started Running down the path which I could tell had Lot of Roots to trip me up and Many Ups and Downs to Test Me. This Time I CHOSE the Road less Traveled by. As I said it’s NOT the Road for Most, and NOT because they Lack anything at ALL, it’s just one of MANY roads/paths we are presented with in Life and being ALL different (us Cuckolds and Hotwifes know this Better than Most) some paths do NOT Fit US. Some paths are WRONG for US. Whether this path I Chose is Wrong for me still is Not completely decided. BUT if the last less than 2 years are an indication, I FINALLY Chose the Path that my Whole Life has been Leading ME too. I have well,… Since I started Running down this Path, I have Embraced it. Felt More ME than I Ever Felt before. In Spite of Roots tripping me and stubbing my toes. In Spite of Challenging Hills and Lessons to be learned with Falling down along the way here and there. I find myself not only Unable to turn around and go back but to Eagerly get back up and start Charging Forward again.

    It started at that Fork. That is where I DECIDED I HAD to KNOW and though I have said I’m not Very Social Media Savvy, at All (don’t even know what this Kik is that some have asked me if I’m on). I did know about Craigslist. Though I had Never got on it I had seen Co-workers do it at work. Mostly shopping for things like cars or car parts etc. But occasionally I knew that they went to the Personals to get a kick out of them (even the Men looking for Men and Casual Encounters ones). Probably one of the Bigger reasons that my wife and I Never went down this Feminization, Sissification Path very far when we had Progressed down so Many others, is that Pre-internet it was VERY difficult and took a LOT of LUCK to Find the Right Man to help take us down that Path. The Internet and Sites like Craigslist Drastically changed all that. So one night after my girlfriend went to bed I was of course Unhappy and Horny and KNEW I had to check Craigslist.

    I was Surprised by what I saw. Since it was listed in the Semi-Rural area that I’m in (MUCH less rural than when I first moved here more than 25 years ago) I was Surprised at how Many ads there were under the Casual Encounter or men looking for Men. Quickly I noticed that I was a Naïve Novice. I kept seeing ads having to do with “Bottoms” looking for “Tops? I had NO idea what that meant and had to google it. I guess I should have known. So I was a “Bottom” and looking for a “Top”. But there was a Majority of those (Bottoms) over the other Ads. HOW did a Sissy Gurl CLOSER to 60 years old than 50, stand a Snowballs Chance in Hell as they say?

    But I pressed on reading, and Finally got the courage to answer. First one then two and a third. After answering a few that I thought looked promising, all seemed Masculine Men, I waited anxiously for a Reply. Struck OUT. But after waiting SO Many Decades, I was undeterred. Waited a bit and answered a few more. Stuck OUT. Then a few more, and a few more. Finally over a couple of weeks I had answered at LEAST a Dozen, Probably a Lot more, and was REJECTED by EVERY single ONE. Yeah some of them showed some interest, at First, but ALL ended up Saying that I was Not what they were looking for. I was Completely CRUSHED at the end of those first weeks. I was Now CONVINCED that my Fears that I had Waited Too LONG were Exactly what had happened. It was True that I was TOO OLD, that NO Man would ever want me and Lust ME as a GURL. That I did NOT have a body that MEN would LUST after for Sex with ME as a GURL. Closer to 60 years OLD than 50. You can NOT turn back Time, and Any Opportunity that I had for making those 40 PLUS years of Desires come True was in the PAST. I was So Discouraged, and Despondent that I fell into a DEEP and DARK Depression. My Unhappiness had Finally lead me to Try and what happened was a Much More Gnawing and Intense Unhappiness.
     
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2017
  3. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    A previous Decades Long Cuckold FINALLY begins a Second Life by Letting The Sissy :
    Gurl Trapped within to Live too.

    My Sissy Gurl Life Installment 2: Step after Step the Momentum Builds till a FAST approaching Fork in the Road is Quickly in front of me.(Continued due to forum length limitations).

    Finally after Weeks of it I decided I had to TRY One more time. I HAD to know, For SURE. I told myself that I just could NOT get to my Very Old Age and Wonder forever IF I had REALLY gotten my answer or IF I had just Quit too soon. But I didn’t want to keep doing what I was doing. So my Analytic mind took over for my “little head”. I looked at it all and thought that Maybe my Mistake was answering other’s Ad’s. Maybe I was Reading Wrong what THEY were Really Looking for (most Ads are VERY short leaving a Lot to be interpreted). So I decided that I had to do what I was Scared to do. Place my OWN Ad. That was the ONLY way I could be Sure figuring that IF NO Man wanted to answer MY Ad then I was right that No Man Lusted, ME. But it HAD to be the Right Ad.

    I’m a Scientific “guy” and have NO experience in Advertising what you are TRYING to get someone Interested in. BUT I’ve been Barraged by Ads my Whole Life, I knew what sells Me. Plus having been a “man” to some extent my Whole life I Knew what made MEN interested, especially in Sex and Girls. So I Hoped that I could translate that into Interest in this GURL. I Knew the First KEY was to get the Man to CLICK on the Ad. That meant a Title that would get them curious enough to Click and also I Knew that attaching a Least One picture Also would make a Man (Men are Very Visual Sexually) want to SEE the picture(s). Most Ads I saw on Craigslist had Titles that were Very Short and Straight to the point (and therefore not setting themselves apart). For example “Bottom looking for Top”, “Horny Bottom Seeks Tops”, “Looking to Suck Cock”. My First Title was at least a Bit better, I think, but it was still my First attempt. It was “Want-to-be Sissy Gurl Looking for a Friend with Benefits”. Then IF I could get a Man to Click I knew Again, that Men are Very Visual (usually) Sexually. So the First photo that shows when they First click on the Ad HAD to Catch their Interest or they would Click Right Back OFF. It HAD to POP. I looked at the Photos I had, Many but no where near what I have today. The Feminine Side of me knew that Color, especially Bright Color, POPPED. So of course I chose one with me in my girlfriends Green Panties and Fishnet Thigh Highs with some Pink at the top (Actually Pink Bows which you can’t see in the picture because they are in the front). It’s the exact same photo that I Currently use in my avatar. I then added a 2nd picture, this one I was in some Pink Crotchless Panties, complete with a bow over my ass, that and Sheer black thigh highs (I always had a thing for thigh highs as a “man” and I Adore them as a Gurl). Both of these I had brought for myself (the others I brought for my girlfriend but I’ve kind of Permanently Borrowed them).

    Hoping that the pictures would get them to go from Nibbling at the Bait to Grabbing it, I so they would take the Time to continue on to READING my Ad. Which is where I HOPED to “Set the Hook”. I HAD to be Interesting, it HAD to be Detailed (could I write it any other way). Detailed because That is WHO I am and also because I Wanted to make it as Clear has I could WHAT I was Looking for AND Much MORE Importantly to the MAN, WHAT I was Offering, THEM.

    I explained in as “few” words as I could that I had Spent my Whole Life as a masculine man with a Secret Sissy Gurl Trapped inside me. That I FINALLY decided that we get but ONE Life and that I wanted to LIVE it Fully. That I was Submissive Sexually and looking for a Dominant Real Man. That I was looking for a Friend with Benefits. That I was still masculine in Public but would be their Sissy Gurl in Private. Then I added because I did NOT want to play games and mislead the Man, that I was mid 50’s, but that most people told me that I looked late 30’s” and that Age wasn’t important to me. When I was satisfied with that First effort I Hesitated for a while asking myself IF I REALLY wanted to post it. But decided I HAD to and Clicked to Post it. Then Waited. But it was REALLY late at night by this time (actually early in the morning) and after I didn’t get any “nibbles” for close to an hour I went to bed. You can Surely Guess how I FAST I checked my private recently created Sissy Gurl email when I awoke.

    But Sorry this Installment is More than long enough. So All I will say to close this Installment is that I was TRULY Shocked and HUMBLY Thrilled by the Response.

    P.S. the photos are attached.
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited: Aug 3, 2017
  4. slinky1

    slinky1 Well-Known Member

    Pic 1... yes please :p
     
    Explore with me and Pathedick like this.
  5. DeannaHouston

    DeannaHouston Well-Known Member

    That is beautiful, good for you accepting and loving yourself.
     
  6. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    Thank You, I mean Really, REALLY THANK YOU.
    You Greatly improved an otherwise bad day.
     
    Explore with me likes this.
  7. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    A previous Decades Long Cuckold FINALLY begins a Second Life by Letting The Sissy :
    Gurl Trapped within to Live too.

    My Sissy Gurl Life Installment 3: My First Day of My Second Life, My First Day of My Sissy Gurl Life.

    I had gone to bed LATE one night Totally Discouraged, and Despondent and in a DEEP and DARK Depression. That Unhappiness had Finally lead me to Try that Road that I had RESISTED for over 4 Decades in the Fast Fading and Long Shot, Probably LAST chance to take that Fork on that Road/Path. Clinging to an Optimistic Dreamers Hope, NO it was More than that, I was Clinging to a Deep Felt, LONG Debated and Self Analyzed BELIEF that the Path would provide Relief from my Intense Unhappiness. Due to That Road/Path being the ONE that I Belonged ON, at Least Now, IF not from the Very beginning of my Sexual Awareness.

    I woke up some Short Hours later and my Private Sissy Gurl email Inbox Revealed that the Hope and Belief just Might not have been Unfounded. There were Several Emails from Several Different Real Men titled “Hi Sissy Gurl” (that’s what I had Requested that Any Man who Might be Interested in ME, to put in the Title). To see those WORDS addressed to ME by Not One, Not Two, Not Three but Several Real Men, …..Well I Wonder how many of you (Probably more Hotwifes’ than Cucks) can Imagine How that Made me Feel. Especially after thinking that NO Man would ever Lust ME, and MY body at my current age.

    I was almost shaking as I opened them one after another, my little dicklet as my wife had always called it and now my little sissy clitty as I call it was getting stiffer with each email. These REAL Men were saying things like “Damn Girl/Gurl, I Hope you are Real”, “ You are Hot”, “Great Ass”, “I’m having all kinds of thoughts about what I would do to Your Sexy Ass”. And they were saying them to ME. As I said I was Shocked, Thrilled, and couldn’t Believe it. But I Desperately Wanted to Believe it. I Desperately Wanted to Believe that the LIGHT that had Greeted me when I checked my Sissy Gurl email that morning just early last year was Real. Because of that Desperation to Escape my Unhappiness, and those Rejections that I had received answering others Ads, combined with my Total Naivete with Social media/Craigslist and the Sissy Gurl Life, I made some mistakes along this Path I had Finally taken. Especially at that Beginning. I had to learn to Filter. I had to learn what to Say, and What to Not Say. I had to learn what to Reveal, and What you Should NEVER Reveal. I had SO VERY MUCH to Learn, not just how to Flirt with Real Men as a Gurl, but I had to LEARN how to BE a Gurl and THEN how to Pleasure a Real Man. But I had NEVER been a More Enthusiastic Pupil.

    But those mistakes were just those Toe Stubbing Roots on the Path, most of the time, and even when they would actually Trip me up and cause a Painful Fall, they couldn’t keep me from getting back up and Charging down the Path again. You might ask Why? Well to get back to that Shocked and Thrilled, which turned out was Intoxicating because of the Sexual Desire that was being shown towards ME.
    As a “man” I surely did NOT feel that very often at ALL and when it came to the Numbers of Real Girls/Women that I have felt that From, well lets put it this way. Here I was Closer to 60 Years Old than 50 and the number of Girls/Women that I had Sex with could be counted on ONE Hand WITH a Finger AND the Thumb leftover. Just those First Several emails gave me a Feeling of being Wanted as a Sexual Individual at a Level that I wasn’t used to. At ALL. As a Sexual beta male I had been a Dud as a man, but by Finally giving in to those DECADES old Feelings and Urges and choosing this New Path as a Sissy Gurl with the LONG Suppressed Feminine side FINALLY set FREE to Live, suddenly it appeared that MAYBE the man was a Dud but the Gurl was Hot. Maybe but it was still WAY too early for me to Believe it, Yet.

    So I started to Respond to the emails one by one. Sending another picture to show that I was Real and then started Flirting with these Real Men that SEEMED to Lust ME, and MY body. I would ask them to tell me more about themselves, their Experience, and What they were interested in doing with me. I would tell them what I was Interested in Providing for them. And of course my Feminine side seem to come out and Fish for further compliments and Further affirmation that it Really was Me and My body that they and their Cocks were Lusting and Interested in. Fishing for compliments and their thoughts on my Legs and Ass which based on the comments I was receiving so far seemed to be My Best ASSets (Assets that I had Worked Hard to get and Develop during training for one of the sports that I have had success in).

    At first I was a little Awkward Flirting with Men but unlike when I would try to Flirt with Girls/Women during my Whole Life, it Quickly Felt Very Natural Flirting with Men, as a Gurl. The emails kept coming. First replies to my replies but also intermingled with NEW Men responding to My Ad. All Day Long they came. It was as I said Truly Intoxicating, I NEVER wanted that day/night to end, Afraid that when I went to bed I would wake up and it ALL would have been a Dream. That Intoxication was only tempered by trying to Find the time to do all this Flirting with….. Well I Quickly and Naturally to Me, came to think of them as “My Men”, or at least “My Potential Men”. My girlfriend and I were spending the day watching Playoff Football and Football is VERY Important to Me, Usually but that day it seemed a Lot less Important as I tried to Discreetly Flirt with those Potential Men. The Most Intoxicating Thought was ……ONE of these Men Could turn out to be the FIRST Man this Gurl would EVER be with in Real Life.

    Over the next 2 or 3 days the emails kept coming (YEAH I woke up the next day and it wasn’t a Dream). That first Ad, and I am NOT exaggerating resulted in at LEAST 20 different MEN, mostly Real Men, but also a few fellow Sissy Gurls or Sissy Gurl Want-to-be’s or thinking about being. Over those days they were ALL treated with Potential but of course they were slowly dwindled, sorted, eliminated. Either by Me or by them. In the same way that I wasn’t right for the Men whose Ad’s I answered, NOT everyone is Right for Everyone, even for just a Casual Encounter.

    Plus like a Real Girl I REALLY wanted my First Man to be Special and the Right One, even if it was probably nothing more than a Casual Encounter and we Probably wouldn’t repeat. I felt this way even though I was VERY eager, bordering on Desperate still from the Insecurity due to my thoughts on my age, and my having had SO little experience with being Sexually Desired combined with those Rejections.

    Eventually they had filtered down to a handful of High Potentials but with One noticeable front runner. But I of course will Dish on Him and my Very First Date as a Sissy Gurl with a Real Man in my NEXT Installment.

    P.S. Here is another of my Early pictures and likely was one of the ones I used to help Prove that I was Real.
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited: Aug 11, 2017
  8. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    A previous Decades Long Cuckold FINALLY begins a Second Life by Letting The Sissy :
    Gurl Trapped within to Live too.

    My Sissy Gurl Life Installment 4: The Brand New Sissy Gurl, gets a Name and her VERY First Man.

    Please forgive and accept the length of this Installment which requires splitting it into parts, because it’s Length is due to it’s Importance, Event Wise in My New Sissy Gurl Life. Just like my First Event in my Cuckold Life, but when I Recounted that Event Titled “Who Needs Pictures with a Memory Like Mine”, it was from over 30 years earlier. This event was less than 2 years ago, so that Memory is even Stronger and Clearer, Vivid.

    The email Flirting continued and for this NEW Sissy Gurl, Learning Continued. I had SO MANY questions coming Into and Running through my mind. I was More than Hesitant of asking the Men, but sometimes did, especially the more Experienced ones. But I had to word the questions right and intermingle them with things that I was Pretty sure would excite them and keep them interested. I knew I could get away with more questions BECAUSE I was a COMPLETE Virgin. That’s a Big Turn on for a Lot of Men. But I asked Most of the questions to the fellow Sissy Gurls that responded, especially those that at least Seemed to have Experience. But they asked me some too (and of course the Men did too). I think it was a Sissy Gurl though that asked a question that I wasn’t expecting therefore had NO answer to it. It was “What is your Feminine\Sissy Gurl name?”. WOW the question Hit me like a Ton of Bricks. Here I had Never thought about it but INSTANTLY it suddenly became the Most important Question in My New Life. It became ALL I could think about. Names, came into my head, but were Quickly dismissed. This went on for MORE than a Day. Maybe closer to Two. Then when I was Completely Alone, and Undistracted and Relaxed with an Unoccupied Mine, it came. I KNEW RIGHT away it was RIGHT. Because it Felt So NATURAL, Felt SO…… ME. I Loved and ADORED it from the FIRST time the word came from my lips….CiCi. That is WHO I Was, WHO I AM, CiCi. I said it Over and Over and Over. I was half French, my Mother was from French Parents and I felt like I was a French Sissy (my Hotwife and I had even discussed, but NEVER acted on the fantasy of putting me in a French Maid outfit to Serve Her and her Lovers, to my Delight). I Felt SURE that the name CiCi was the ONE meant for ME.

    Now I’m going to get WAY ahead of myself (for only this paragraph) and jump from Early last year to Over a year later, early this year. Why, well because with each passing month of that year I had FELT and Became more and more Feminine and Embracing of that Stronger All the time side of me (MUCH more on that as I post my story). So though CiCi was enough for My Men, CiCi had become REAL enough to NEED a Last name, a Surname, For HER\ME. I’m a Big History buff, as well as Scientific, and knew that the first name, the Given name was supposed to be WHO you were. CiCi, was WHO I was. But in the OLD days of the beginnings of Surnames, they were Chosen based on WHAT a person was. The last name Thatcher was for a Roofer (thatched roofs) and Miller was for of course a Man who Milled grain. Smith came from Blacksmith. So since CiCi was French I only had to decide from that, WHAT CiCi was. So I came up with Salope. For the “Rest of the Story\Explanation” go to Google and type “French to English” and then enter Salope into the Text for the French word you want Translated. So Now, at Least INSIDE I am CiCi Salope. And Yes I’ve said it over and over and over to practice my Feminine voice (which needs a Lot of work still), “Hi, I’m CiCi Salope”.

    So CiCi (at the time) had a First name, a Feminine name. Now she needed her Very First Man. As I said there was ONE Man out of those First close to 2 Dozen Men who responded to my, or CiCi’s Very first Ad, that stood out to me. He had Experience with Sissy Gurls, and Flirted REALLY NICE. He was just the right combination of Respectful of and to me as a Gurl, and Dominate of me as a Sexually Submissive Sissy Want -to-be. Unlike some of the Men (who can’t seem to string more a 4 words together), he was though Not as Wordy and Expressive as CiCi, (I’m Different, but it’s Me) but he was Expressive enough and good at it getting his thoughts across. Plus he was Very Understanding of My Fears, and Uncertainty. It all made him endearing enough that he not only seemed Trustworthy, but he therefore could Also make me start to feel SAFE. Why might I need to feel Safe? Well first there is the Whole meeting a Stranger to be Alone with Him, For Sex. Plus one of my Favorite TV shows is Criminal Minds, makes you think about WHO and WHAT is OUT there.

    But there was more to my needing to feel Safe. That was because the Physical Differences between Him and CiCi. As a woman CiCi was Medium to Semi Large (but I’m smaller now, having lost over 20 pounds, and counting, since then, and those early pictures, wait to you see my new ones. But all in due time, IF you are Interested), but as a “man” I’m Small of statue and My First Man? Well Physically he was Definitely All Real Man and Couldn’t be more of a Contrast. He was Over 20 years Younger than me. In his Very early 30’s. He had Played Defensive Line on a Major Powerhouse Division 1 College Football team. He outweighed me by WELL over a Hundred Pounds. A Very Big Man. The Rest of his Physical description is that he had a beard, was Black and had a Truly Beautiful Real Man’s Cock. Very Thick and All of 9 inches Long. My wife and I had discussed and Fantasized MANY times about Black Men and Black Cock. Both for Her and as part of my Feminizing/Sissify Fantasies. BUT again the Opportunity Never seemed to Happen. UNTIL NOW.

    We Flirted for, Believe it or Not, exactly One Month, MANY Dozens of Emails. I was of course Eager, but also Scared. I had informed him that since I was a Complete Virgin, Mouth and Asspussy, and He was SO Big and Thick, I was Too Afraid to let him take my Sissy Pussy Virginity. He was of course Disappointed but Also Very Understanding and Agreed without much pushing. I told Him I REALLY Wanted his Big Beautiful Cock but I had to lose my Virginity to someone at least a bit smaller. But He could have CiCi’s Oral Virginity, and told him how my Sissy Mouth was watering everytime I thought about it and looked at his pictures (he sent me a few, I’ll attach the one of him hard). One of the reasons it took SO long from first contact till the Meet was Our Schedules and Real Life. Then at the time I wouldn’t host (had almost NO ability to anyway) and he also had limited ability. Then at almost the last minute his girlfriend was going to be home and I was SO Desperate to FINALLY be with My First Man, and Taste my First Cock, that I made an Exception (the only time I’ve done it) and booked a local hotel room (he told me which one, because they had several rooms with outside entrances so he could enter and leave without going by the desk since he knew people that worked there).

    The Day came I was a NERVOUS WRECK. I checked in, went to the room and dressed with slightly trembling hands. I’m going to attach one of the photo’s that I Actually Took in that Hotel Room while CiCi was waiting for Her Very First Man. BUT I am NOW more than a bit Ashamed of that picture. Why? Well first as I said I weighed more then, And I was Still a Hairy sissy then. Though I was Not quite the Hairy Bear type, I was a hairy “man”, and I was Afraid of shaving anything because my girlfriend would ask questions that I couldn’t answer (at that time). But I figured that I could shave my asspussy without her noticing it (of course I SLICED one of my cheeks the Very first time I did it, I told her I scratched it through my pants on a sharp metal object at work). A terrible looking red streak about 3 inches long, it’s PAINFUL being a Gurl sometimes). I even at that time still had a mustache and small soul patch below my lower lip. With my Long brown hair think Wild Bill Hickok just not as big a mustache. I did NOT hide these facts from the Men I was Flirting with, I didn’t want to Surprise them with it during a meet. Actually the first Several Men that CiCi met with, I still had all that hair. But a couple of months later I made it ALL go Away (that story will come later). So all this to say, Though the Men that I met with seemed to Love what they saw when I was standing before them in the flesh, I’m NOT Happy with the way I looked then.

    I then was WAITING for My Man to arrive. I wasn’t sure I would still be breathing when he got there I was SO Nervous. I had put on lipstick for the First Time (No other make up because I didn’t and still Don’t know how, but I am looking at getting some professional instruction, IN Private, which isn’t cheap). The lipstick was of course Bright Red (still my Favorite, though I also have a Bright Pink depends on my Outfit). I was so Nervous I had a beer while trying not to ruin my lipstick. He was late and I was peeking out the blinds in order to see him approaching the room. Finally I saw him walking towards the room. WOW he was BIG compared to CiCi, But he looked good and Nice. He was only wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt with the sleeves cut off. It wasn’t a Dress up date, Except for CiCi’s Lingerie (I didn’t even have any girl heels for months yet either so I was wearing only my Beloved Thigh Highs). Then came the knock on the door.
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited: Aug 22, 2017
  9. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    My Sissy Gurl Life Installment 4: The Brand New Sissy Gurl, gets a Name and her VERY First Man. (Continued from above)

    Moment of Truth, Open the door CiCi and Meet Your Man and let Him see You. I opened the door with me staying behind it, I still do it that way, Like the Whole World is outside the door watching me in my Sissy Gurl Outfits. He stepped in and I shut the door then he First Hugged me and I him, my arms couldn‘t fit around him. Then he looked at ME, and MY body and asked me to turn 360, I did and he said “NICE, I Like it”. I said “I Hope you aren’t disappointed”. He Replied “Absolutely Not”. That Relaxed me, a Bit. So I couldn’t believe it but INSTINCTIVELY I then turned and walked to the corner of the bed and bent over with my legs spread just over shoulder width apart and placed my hands on the bed to stick my Best Assets out as Sexy as I could. He groaned and came up behind me and caressed my legs and then fondled my ass then even reached to fondle my sissy clitty and balls. I Sighed and Moaned a little bit RELISHING my first Touch of a Strong Man’s Hands on my Body. It was Beyond Wonderful, Oh Why did I wait SO Very Long? I said to him in as girly a voice as I could but not much more than a sighing whisper “Oh Daddy that feels so Good, Do you like Me Daddy?” and he replied “Daddy Likes your Body CiCi”. Now you are wondering where did the word “Daddy” come from? Well that was His Idea. I had asked what He wanted me to call him. At first I was QUITE taken Aback by the request that I call him Daddy. Wondering what was behind it. But then I found out that it is Actually Very common in the Sissy Lifestyle. Then I discovered that I Really Liked the Fantasy of being Daddy’s Naughty Sissy Gurl (more on that later). I don’t know about anyone Else but in my case, I do NOT believe I have ANY Daddy issues (Sexually), so that’s not were My Fantasy comes from.

    I turned around and dropped to my stocking knees, a VERY Eager Sissy Gurl. He told me to pull down his sweats pant and then feel his Cock though his boxers. I couldn’t wait too. When I placed my hand on his Big, Semi Hard Cock, an Unbelievable THRILL coursed through my Body and Mind. He told me to pull down his shorts and I did, with his Big Black Cock springing out. He asked do you like it CiCi? I told him “Daddy it’s Twice the size of my sissy clitty and it‘s Gorgeous” and he told me “Well then take it into your hands and Show me what you think of it”. I took it in my small hands and looking up at him leaned forward and Lovingly kissed the top of his Huge Mushroom Head. Then went down to his Massive balls and kissed them, then kissed all the way up his Long Shaft. It was BEAUTIFUL to ME, it was MORE than that, It was a WORK of ART. And this Man was Letting ME Worship it. I looked back into his eyes and said “Thank You Daddy” then opened my mouth and took my VERY First Cock into it. My VERY FIRST Taste of Cock. Of course it was Delicious. But it was SO MUCH MORE than that. There were So Many Thoughts, and Multiple Senses (like Taste and Smell, even Sound), and Sensations. A Lot of them I was expecting and was NOT Disappointed in ANY Way by the Experience of them For Real. Especially since they were More Intense than Expected. BUT there were some that I was Not Expecting. First there was how it FELT both in my hands and in my mouth, I had handled my little dicklet/sissy clitty my WHOLE life, this felt NOTHING like that. Yes it was Big, and Thick. So Much More So than mine, but it was the Heft of it , the Immense HEFT, and Weight of it. But out of those Unexpected Sensations the one that Surprised, Amazed and Thrilled me the Most was the POWER. The POWER I Felt within His Cock with my Hands and my Mouth. It was like the Combination of the Massive Length, Thickness, Heft combined with the now HARDNESS of it, was POWERFUL. Like it Possessed the POWER to Punch though steel. It Shocked me but made me Eager and Honored to provide this Cock and this Man as much Pleasure as I could.

    He asked how I liked it, I looked at him with JOY and said “I always thought I would like Sucking a Cock, I was WRONG, I ADORE and LOVE Sucking Cock”. He Laughed and said, Now lets work on making you a Great CockSucker. I said “Yes Daddy”. He started to instruct me, saying I was doing well (I knew to keep my teeth out of the way and worked hard on that especially considering his Thickness requiring my mouth to stretch wide). I also knew to swirl my tongue both with his cock in my mouth and around it after pulling it out. He said to Drool and Spit if necessary to keep all his Heft nice and wet. I was Definitely Drooling. Then I started employing tricks and Techniques my wife and girlfriend had used on me. I used my hands to lightly caress his Heavy Nuts before licking and taking each into my mouth, Savoring the Man Muskiness and Taste. The More I Licked, Sucked, and Savored the More Girly I felt. It Seemed my “manliness” was draining out of me a little at a time. The more He grabbed my head and long hair and firmly but also gently (knowing his size and my virginity) pressed his Cock a bit deeper until I Gagged and then backing off. And I definitely did some Gagging. The less manly and more Girly I became.

    After a bit he had me lay down on my stomach and pulled aside my panties and started fondling, and licking my ass cheeks. Giving them a few firm, slightly stinging but Not Hurtful smacks on my Naughty Ass every so often. Then he spread my cheeks and started licking my asspussy which he had told me he would so I made sure I was VERY clean. I just lay there moaning and squirming my ass and hips at him seeking his Manly Touch of his hands and mouth. He was REALLY enjoying himself too, saying over and over what a Fine Girly Ass and Sissy Pussy I had. I was In Heaven. He reached under me and fondled and stoked my limp little sissy clitty. I’ve found that I usually stay soft and limp when with a Man (but not every time), but many in the Sissy Lifestyle think this is how a Good Sissy Gurl should be with Her Man (I’ve come to believe it too). After quite awhile doing this he turned me over and had me put my head hanging off the bed and stepped up and put his Man Meat back where it Belonged, In my Sissy Gurl Mouth. He flexed his hips back and forth fucking my mouth, occasionally bringing a gag from me but always backing off immediately. I think he Liked his Power and Control over me and the situation, and So Did I. It was like Sucking Cock is what I was Born to do.

    After that he had me get on all fours on the bed spanked me a few times again and played with my ass using his hands and mouth some more. Followed by then turning his attention to my sissy clitty a little too, even giving it a few sucks in his mouth. Then he laid down on his back with his shoulders propped up with pillows and with his shorts off and his Defensive Lineman Tree Trunk Legs spread out before me. I crawled between them AWED by the site and the Contrast between His Skin Color, Size and Manliness as compared to my Skin, Size and Growing Femininity. His Power and My Submissiveness. I sucked his Cock Lovingly some more wrapping my hands around all the Powerful shaft that I couldn’t fit into my mouth and moved my hands up and down on it in Rhythm with my Widely Stretched (and getting tired mouth. Being that I was untrained). Finally I switched to using my sissy mouth like my Wife had done to me with her Talented Tongue during her MANY Lick Jobs (as described in Decades of Cuckold Thread). I licked and Slobbered all over his balls, then lower under his balls, then lower working closer and closer to his asshole. Then like my Wife I rimmed him Enjoying the moans that came from him like she Loved the Moans that came from me and ALL Her Other Lovers. He was jerking his Cock while I was doing this, So since I knew the effect of having this done by my wife caused me, I stopped for a second and said “Tell me when you are going to Cum, I want it in my mouth”. Unfortunately he got caught up in the moment and didn’t tell me. When I saw he had shot a HUGE Beautiful Creamy Load onto his Defensive Lineman belly, I was Disappointed (I REALLY was looking forward to Finally Feeling a Real Man’s Cock Throb and Shoot in my mouth). But I quickly moved up, and used All my Practice from my Decades of Cuckold Life to Lick, Suck Savor and Enjoy Every Delicious Drop. Kissing his Softening but still Massive Cock Thanking him over and over.

    He just lay there Trying to catch his breath, I could tell that he was Completely Spent, and Sexually Satisfied and then he said so saying “WOW that was Amazing and I need a few minutes to recover. Then I have to go. ” I Swelled with Pride, a Real Man lay Exhausted and Sexually Satisfied on the bed of a Hotel room and I had done that to Him. Me, CiCi. I had made a Man Orgasm. I was on Top of the World and Happy in that moment. I WAS a SISSY GURL.
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2017
  10. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    I know I said that I would post some recent photos of CiCi, IF there was someone Interested. Well, I'm Not sure IF Anyone is interested but decided that I just Couldn't let that last picture of me Stand in Peoples minds as what CiCi looks like as a Gurl.
    No I am Still Not Satisfied with how I look even now after over 20 pounds lost (and losing all that Yucky hair). I will lose more weight and continue to Tone up. A Gurl has to work hard to keep the Men Hard.

    These photos are of me in CiCi's First Ever (2 of them), Regular dresses. I have had other Fantasy type Costume outfits but No Regular Girl Dresses until these. I was BEYOND Thrilled and Excited when I opened them. I Squealed "Dresses!!!". Then when I tried them on I was even more Thrilled and Pleased.
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited: Aug 25, 2017
  11. aloneandneeding

    aloneandneeding Active Member

    Sissy stuff is not for me but you know what pathedick. I'm all for it in your life. I support you all the way and if Iwas attracted in that way you dress really well.
     
  12. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    This is after Two months of pueraria mirifica .

    I was pretty flat chested before I started because No I don't lift weights and work out (besides running) like a woman who saw me a month ago in a tight running shirt asked me.

    I Adore having bobbies.
     

    Attached Files:

  13. christinebitg

    christinebitg Well-Known Member

    There is something inherently satisfying about making a man come, isn't there?

    xoxoxo

    Christine
     
  14. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    YES it is, And it NEVER gets old. It is Always Thrilling and Electriflying.
     
  15. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    Oh and THANK YOU SO MUCH Christine, your reading, and bothering to Like CiCi's recounting the start of her LIFE so late in life. I have followed your posts on here for Years, and therefore it means even more to me.
     
  16. hankhavelock

    hankhavelock Well-Known Member

    I couldn't agree more, mon ami
     
    aloneandneeding and Pathedick like this.
  17. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    Merci Beaucoup
     
    aloneandneeding and hankhavelock like this.
  18. aloneandneeding

    aloneandneeding Active Member

    You are looking good their Path.
     
  19. Pathedick

    Pathedick Well-Known Member Founding Member

    Thank you Sir.
    I must admit that I Truly Enjoy looking in the mirror and seeing ME with Girly Boobies. I also Adore the feeling of them under my shirt
     
  20. obedientcuck

    obedientcuck Well-Known Member

    Good for you, Pathedick. Life's too short not to do what gives you pleasure.
     

Share This Page